It's Always Something...

2011 Recap

2011-12-31T21:53:00.012+04:00

2011 was a big year for us as a family, and of course the addition of Lila to our family was easily the highest point of the year, but we did a lot of fun things. Here are some pics of some of the things we did this year.

January

We started the year out right with some Arabic food and family and friends.

Jackson decided he didn't care for baby food. :)

And we had Cru over for a playdate!

February

Jackson got an ear infection. :(

And then learned to sit up all by himself!

March

Jackson got his first hair cut!

Maddy and Momma E came to visit and Maddy and Jackson were BFFs.

Our whole family went to the park.

April

The Easter Bunny came to visit us!

We dyed eggs and Jackson tried to eat them whole.

We went for lots of walks and saw the firefighter's memorial in Boise.

Jackson learned to pull up to standing!

May

We spent lots of time at the park in the nice weather.

We ate our breakfasts outside in the backyard.

My baby sister went to prom!

We went to Momma E and Grandad's for a visit and Kaden got to go on the Harley.

We went fishing!

June

We hung out in Daddy's hammock that we got him for father's day.

Miss Adelyn got to come down for a visit!

And we all took a trip to the zoo.

And had a blast in the backyard.

July

My boys celebrated their 1st and 4th birthdays.

Mommy made cupcakes for their beach theme birthday party.

We travelled to Coeur d'Alene and got to meet cousin Keegan (and Uncle Kemer and Aunt Justine) for the first time!

And we got a whole family picture.

August

We went to the Fair (in the hundred+ degree heat, 9 months pregnant, and got all swollen for days. :))

We cooled off in the pool.

Jackson learned to walk!

September

We took family maternity pictures.

Daddy finished the baby's changing table.

We painted our hands and feet and decorated the family growth chart.

Mommy went into labor in the morning on September 18th while watching Madagascar, Escape 2 Africa in bed with the kids, and took a test 5 hours before I delivered our precious Lila girl. :)

The moment I found out I had a daughter.

She came with precious little feet!

Our beautiful Lila Grace.

Our first playdate with our best friend Salem who is exactly two days older than Lila.

Mimi and Papa got to come to see their first great granddaughter.

Momma E meeting her first granddaughter!

October

My fantastic boss and coworkers threw a baby shower for Lila and me.

We went to Jabbers with Jamie and her Mom Cindy and the kiddos.

Baby Jett came over for a playdate!

We carved pumpkins and had a great Halloween.

Jackson got to move from the high chair to the big boy table with the family!

November

Aunt Mo came to visit!

Grandma and Grandpa Fox came with Uncle Norman to visit and Norman and Stu made our house all decoratey!

Uncle Norman and his babies!

Lila was a huge Bronco fan!

December

All of the kids were spoiled at Christmas by Santa and family!

We had Christmas Eve dinner with the Brintons.

We took in the Winter Garden aGlow at the Botanical Gardens.

And my sweet boy donated his piggy bank money to 7Cares to benefit the Idaho Food Bank and the Boise Rescue Mission.

3-Month Update and Multiple Hats

2011-12-20T19:26:00.011+04:00

Can you believe it's been THREE WHOLE MONTHS since Miss Lila was welcomed into our family? I certainly can't. But she has melded into our family perfectly and it feels like we were always waiting for her.

She is the BEST little baby. Stu has been having slightly more trouble with her since I went back to work full time, but she is always so calm and sweet and a good sleeper... she's just perfect! (Am I gushing??? :)) It's just such a change from Jackson. In her entire little life, she has never once woke up in the middle of the night and not gone back to bed after she eats. Jackson would constantly get up and never go back to sleep, or scream for hours and not sleep, regardless of what we tried to do to comfort or console him. BUT, on that front, we have good news to report! Jackson is sleeping through the night (almost always)!

As most know, from the time of his infancy, he would always wake up at night, well, after 17 LONGGGGG months, some sleepy time herbal pills, a specific bedtime ritual, and a nightlight later, he is finally sleeping. I had been getting fairly concerned a couple of weeks before I went back to work because both babies were waking up several times at night, and of course at different times, so neither Stu nor myself were getting any decent REM sleep night after night and I was worried I might actually die of sleep deprivation. Luckily (SO luckily!), a couple of days before I was back full time, he started sleeping through almost every night. Sadly, I think it was the nightlight that really did it. I think our poor kid was afraid of the dark and we've just been making him suffer for the past 17 months. Ugh. It was certainly not for lack of effort though.

As far as the rest of the family goes, Kaden is looking forward to Christmas and seeing what Santa is going to bring for him. He is super into it this year and it makes the holidays so much more fun! Kaden actually got to be featured on our local News Channel 7 because he decided to donate the money in his piggy bank to the needy and they thought that was pretty fantastic. (Which of course it was.) Stu and I had been discussing taking the kids to the grocery store so Kaden could pick out some food to take to 7Cares, which was benefitting 2 local homeless shelters and the food bank, and use it as an opportunity to model caring behavior, and when we talked about giving money as well, an eavesdropping Kaden said, “I wanna donate some money too!” And I said, “Ok, bud, we’ll give you some money that you can give to them.” And he remembered that he had his “own” money in his piggy bank. I was delicate about it at first because I thought he might change his mind when we got there, but he was all about it and told the reporter exactly why he was giving his money “to the Mommies and Daddies who can’t buy food or presents for their kids,” but when they went to go live, he got freaked out and they had to talk to Mommy about it instead. My sweet, loving boy. Here is the link to the broadcast.

Kaden on Twitter!

Kaden on the home page of KTVB Channel 7 News' website!

Kaden giving a (very young, adorable) Marine some Toys for Tots.

Stu and Norman (Stu's brother) hung up our Christmas lights when he and Stu's parents were in town for Thanksgiving and every night when Stu turns them on, Kaden wants to run (usually in his socked feet in 30-degree weather) to the edge of the street and look at the house. He is SO EXCITED and it absolutely makes it all worthwhile. We're taking him on a helicopter ride again this year to see the city lights and everything all decorated and he is looking forward to that. He is also stoked that he will be starting preschool in January and can't wait to meet friends and his teacher. I think it will be good for him to have some more socialization with kids his own age (and not little brothers he can boss around). I can't believe my baby will be old enough to start kindergarten this Fall. WHERE has the time gone???

Kaden, Daddy, and Prancer at the Winter Garden aGlow at the Botanical Gardens.

Kaden, moderately freaked out by Santa, at the Festival of Trees.

Jackson is just growing like a weed! He is freaking adorable and SUCH a mischievous little boy. He is so much more cunning than Kaden ever was and he watches for us to leave the room and then he beelines for something he is not supposed to be into. When we take that item away, he runs to the next thing, causing us to literally chase after him all the time. He is hilarious though and I can already tell that he is going to have a great wit and be the funny one. He is definitely a man's man and loves to wrestle with his Dad and never gets hurt when he falls, just a total tough guy! So opposite from my thoughtful, calculated Kaden.

Uncle Norman and Jackson were best friends for the whole time he was here visiting!

Lila is just finding her niche in the family. She is way more laid back than either of my boys were and I think she just knows she has to wait sometimes to get what she needs if her brothers are needing something or causing a ruckus, and she is usually content to just wait her turn. At night she goes to sleep on her own after I feed and I don't have to be a ninja to put her sleeping self down and get out of the room like I did with the boys. She just grunts and wiggles and chews on her blankey and eventually falls asleep. Her favorite activities include chewing on everything she can get her hands on, including her own hands, and hanging out on Mommy or Daddy's lap. She is fairly indifferent about tummy time, but she likes her bouncy chair and her swing. She is laughing now and whatever it takes to make her grin and laugh are TOTALLY worth it! She is my little princess. She's such a girlie girl though, too, which is a funny change from the boys. Her feelings get hurt more easily and unfamiliar noises startle her more easily too.

Lila with the amazing Dr. Shappard at her 2-month check-up. (All 3 babes with the same doctor. We are luckily to have such a great health care provider.)

Lila on her Quarter-of-a-year birthday!

Lila, showing her support for her Broncos!

Santa Lila having a snack at the Winter Garden aGlow.

Stu and I just finished finals for this semester and w're just trucking along as usual with school. Stu is taking a heavier load next semester, and with the addition of a new baby to the mix, it could be interesting to see how that goes. I have a feeling my bathrooms won't be cleaned and nothing with get dusted (but what else is new with our insane schedule?) but school has to be more important than an organized home for now. Stu and I are both into our upper division requirements now (3- and 400-level classes) which is somewhat motivating because it means we are getting closer to graduating, which feels like such a far-off dream sometimes. I remind myself, though, that we are doing this for our kids and family and some day our lives won’t be so exhausting and complicated.

As I mentioned, I am back to work full time now and it is bitter-sweet. While it does feel good to get up and have a purpose other than “just” being a Mom, and bringing home the bacon, it is definitely hard to leave those little sleepy, warm faces in the mornings and be gone all day. On a positive note, because Lila typically wakes up to eat between 4:30 and 5:30, I have been getting up then too, so I am at work most days around 7 or 7:30, which means I am working for a while before the kids even get up, and can get home that much earlier to be with them again. I try to make sure we are getting in some playtime and down time when I am home at night and not just collapse onto the couch like I want to do most days. Again, this too shall pass. (Repeat.)

Mommy got some new hairs for work! :)

You know, when I named my blog “It’s Always Something” some 4 years ago, I didn’t have any idea of what that would really mean. It is always so appropriate for our crazy life.

And now some family pics! :)

We are a regular circus these days!

The whole Fox Family.

Uncle Norman and his babies!

A wintery shot. (With two grumpy babies.)

There is a special bond between Mommies and their daughters.

Lila Grace's Birth Story

2011-09-22T03:22:00.002+04:00

So for those who are not familiar with my birthing history, Lila’s birth story really has to start with her older brothers’ births. Kaden was a c-section for a failed induction. He had fetal distress and I was listed as “failure to progress” and we went to get cut open. So with Jackson, I educated myself about birth and prepared for a VBAC. I went well over my due date with him and ultimately reluctantly agreed to be induced at 41 + 4 weeks. Jackson’s labor was 17 hours and I ended up getting an epidural at 7 centimeters because Pitocin contractions were just too unbearable and I’d been in the hospital all day. I finally got to ten centimeters but then pushed for 3 and a half hours before my Occipital Transverse baby was born with a tight nuchal cord around his neck and body.

So this time around I decided early on that I would NOT be getting induced if there was any way I could help it and I wanted to labor at home as long as I could. I had been having contractions for literally weeks and I was pretty sure I would be pregnant for weeks more. On Saturday the 17^th we spent the whole day getting the house in order for the baby’s arrival. I just had this nagging feeling that if we didn’t get it done soon, we never would and since we didn’t have much else going on, it was as good a day as any. Kaden was hanging out with Marcia and Deven, so Stu and I took Jackson out to dinner at Red Lobster for all-you-can-eat shrimp, which was awesome. We came home and had a relaxing night and then went to bed.

Contractions woke me up a few times in the middle of night, but it didn’t seem like much was new because it had been happening so often up until that point. I do remember two of them making me feel frustrated because they weren’t very comfortable, but I ignored them and went back to sleep.

We woke up at about 8:30 in the morning and Stu asked if I was going to go back to sleep, or if we could bring the boys into our bed and watch Madagascar. I was having contractions so I just knew I wouldn’t easily fall back asleep anyway, so I agreed and we had a great morning with them in the bed. I realized about half-way through the movie, though, that I was definitely having consistent contractions and they were making it uncomfortable for me to sit on my butt, so I had the first “this might be it” moment.

After the movie we headed downstairs because I told Stu I would make Belgian Waffles for breakfast and by that point I just knew I was in labor. I think Stu was definitely skeptical, but I decided I should call Mimi, who was supposed to be at the birth, and at least get her looking into getting on a plane, though I doubted she would make it in time. I think in between contractions, when I was needing to lean on the counter and focus my attention, Stu realized this might actually be it. We finished breakfast and decided we might want to consider things like letting Marcia know I was in labor and that she would need to come get the boys, pack a hospital bag, etc.

This is where time begins to mean little to me. Basically, for the next 7 hours, Stu followed me around the house while I tried different positions, I took a shower, and later a bath, we went for a couple walks around the neighborhood, hung out in the backyard, all to make labor easier and get through one contraction at a time. At 1 I took my Criminal Evidence exam which had to be comical. Every 3 minutes I would stop reading the test and focus on breathing and getting through contractions, then jump right back into the mindset of the test. I was actually surprised how well I did on the multiple choice, but I know my coherence was lacking on the essay portion, so hopefully that isn’t hurt too bad in the end.

On the last walk we went on, I started to feel like they were getting out of hand. Stu suggested another bath and he went upstairs to draw it for me. This is where I lost my concentration and started to panic a little bit. I was all alone downstairs and no one was reminding me to breathe or touching me, etc, so I started to question my resolve of going drug-free (which wasn’t hugely resolved anyway… I was determined to just have her vaginally, I wasn’t as worried about whether or not I ended up with an epidural or not).

I finally went back upstairs and I told Stu we needed to call the doctor and head in soon. I was feeling more out of control with contractions and in my head, I just wanted to opportunity to have pain relief if I decided to get it, and I wasn’t going to be getting an epidural at home. The bath was really hot and I realized if I got in and got wet, I would have to also get out and dry off before I could leave for the hospital and I didn’t think I was up to that much work (luckily, too, because we probably would have had the baby in the tub). Stu was on the phone with the after hours folks at my doctor’s office because my doctor was out of town and the guy wouldn’t page the doctor who was covering until Dr. Shappard himself first called back and ok’ed it. So again I was without support and I told him he needed to call Marcia to come over to help. When she was on her way, I decided we really needed to go in. I was feeling pretty out of control and I just had my mind set on pain relief.

Marcia got to the house and I remember how frustrated I felt because our house had been super quiet and relaxed all day and when she got there she was cheery and laughing and I felt like she wasn’t taking it seriously, so I just wanted to leave right then. I kept telling them we needed to go and she laughed it off and said I probably had hours to go.

In the truck I hit a wall. I was in the backseat, leaning across Kaden’s carseat and I felt like I had a bowling ball in my butt. Stu got us there and because it was the weekend, he had to drop me off at the maternity center and then park the truck. I intended to wait in the waiting area right there for him, but I had one really strong contraction over the back of one of the seats in the waiting room and I just felt like I needed to get my butt (and the bowling ball in it) to labor and delivery, so I slowly started walking. I had two contractions on the way and one when Stu finally caught up to me and then we got to the door. I told them I was in labor (duh) and they nonchalantly brought me back to a room to “ask you some questions”. Here’s where things get hectic. I had a couple contractions while we were waiting (as soon as we walked in the door I told the nurse I wanted an epidural “yesterday”) and then two different nurses came in because they didn’t find me in the system (even though I had pre-registered) and I remember feeling like they were all such stupid questions and why couldn’t they just ask me after the anesthesiologist left.

They got me on the bed and the nurse said she was going to check me real quick. She goes, “… yep, you’re complete with a bulging bag…. Oop, and here comes your water.” I couldn’t believe I was complete but then she told me that because my water had been coming through my cervix, it was possible that if she checked again I wouldn’t be as dilated because essentially the bag had been holding my cervix open. She rechecked and declared that I was at an 8. All I heard was, “You have 6 more hours to go” because that’s how long it took me to go from an 8 to a ten with Jackson and I just had my eye on the drugs prize. I asked again about getting an epidural and the nurse said, “I don’t think you’re going to have time for that.” I panicked. Another contraction started and I remember thinking that I could definitely NOT do this for a few more hours (or minutes for that matter). Dr. Kapplinger, the hospitalist on staff, came in to see what was going on and around the same time they realized I was a VBAC and the typical panic of VBAC labors ensued. They were having trouble getting the baby’s heartbeat to pick up on the monitor and they told me more than once that baby was having decels with the contractions (so of course, all I hear is, “you’re getting a c-section again”.

About this time I realize that I am bearing down with contractions and I told no one in particular, “I think I am pushing.” The doctor told me that was fine and to go ahead and push if I felt like it. She checked me right after that, with me still hanging over the top of the bed, and the poor nurse trying in vain to place an IV in my hand, and she says, “We need to get you turned around and this bed broken down for delivery.” I panic further. I did not have drugs. There was no way the bowling ball that was in my butt, that I could feel EVERY part of, was ever escaping without drugs. I told them that was impossible because it hurt to bad and I just couldn’t do it. They basically told me, in no uncertain terms, I didn’t have a choice and I needed to get the thought of drugs out of my head because this baby was coming out anyway.

I rolled over and Stu asked the doctor if that was the baby and she said, “Yep, she’s crowning.”

I screamed. A lot. And I panicked more. But I was pushing with all of my might. The doctor told me that with the next contraction the baby would be born if I pushed as hard as I just had. She told me to reach down and touch my baby’s head and it was so weird feeling. All squishy and weird. At that moment the doctor on call arrived in time to fly into her scrubs and catch the baby. It was the WEIRDEST feeling on earth. I felt her head come out (ring of fire, be damned) and if felt like her body was at least 4 feet long as she slide all the way out. Her shoulders were actually harder to get out than I anticipated but then when they were free she just popped out so fast the doctor almost dropped her.

I kept saying “he” throughout the labor and delivery process, so when she came out and the doctor held her up and said, “Ok Daddy, what is it?” And he said, “IT’S A GIRL!” I was like, “WHAT??? Shut up!” I literally could not even fathom having a girl and still, three days later, I can’t believe that I have a daughter of my very own. I got to hold her immediately and no one even tried to take her from me. I had to check myself to make sure she was, in fact, a girl and she was. The repair was at least half as bad as the pain of pushing, but with no drugs, there was no hiding that I could feel EVERYTHING. I was just so shocked and excited to get to meet my baby girl and exclaim with Stu over and over that we, our family, had a baby girl!

A few hours later, after she was a champ at nursing and got her first bath, we finally finished the check-in process in recovery, so they said we could go ahead and have a baby there now. We also got the whole thing on video and the video is 14 minutes long. It was a completely insane and whirlwind experience, and it was absolutely perfect. I wouldn’t change it for the world.

They asked us after she was born what her name was and I said, “I don’t know!” We hadn’t really settled on a girl’s name because we were both so sure that she was a boy, so we finalized it quickly and got to share that we picked Lila Grace. She was 8 pounds, 11 ounces, and 20 inches long with a 13.75 inch head circumference. It was awesome because we got to call our parents and share that they had a granddaughter! She is absolutely perfect and I am loving every second with her!

No time.

2011-08-31T04:21:00.002+04:00

No, I mean I REALLY have no time anymore. For myself especially. So let me try to catch up some, but know that no matter how many things I remember to note, I am forgetting hundreds more things that I am constantly bummed that we'll forget. I started this blog to keep up with our then upcoming adventures in the Middle East and I am ALWAYS so thankful that I did. I even missed things back then, when I blogged on a nearly daily basis for two years. Now that I don't blog but one lame post every couple of months, I just know there are things about Jackson's first year that are going to be forgotten and I hate it.

But, we're freaking busy people. And when I do get a rare second to relax, I want to do it on the couch, in my sweats, a kid or two on my lap, spacing out... not trying to think of something clever to say. :) So lately, we've:

- Gone to CDA to visit the fam and welcomed Justine and Kemer and my sweet nephew Keegan, home from Germany. We had SUCH an awesome time with them. I was so glad we got the chance to have our babies together as babies, especially since we probably won't get the chance to see them near as often as I'd like.

- Experienced the fair. A first for Jackson and a second for Kaden, but the first that he remembered. It was fun, but VERY hot. I am awfully pregnant these days and my hands swelled up so fat I couldn't even make a fist. Then I was having blood pressure issues and it took me a good week to feel "normal" again. (After I just KNEW I was going to go into labor before the week was out... no dice on that one, obviously)

- Celebrated the boys' birthdays. I said I wouldn't do it, but I caved and we had a joint 1st and 4th birthday party for my little rugrats and it was so much fun. Mo and Co. came down from Seattle and we had friends and more family there to help us celebrate their big day. It was great. I found out that both of my boys are serious water babies and we had to talk Kaden out of the pool to do cake and presents and then Jackson stayed in so long that his lips turned blue!

We've tried to get out and about as much as possible while it is "easy" with "only" two kids. :) I laugh at myself because I remember feeling like things were hard to do and plan when we had just a small Kaden, but now we don't even think twice about rounding up the posse and heading out (often forgetting the diaper bag). We even go grocery shopping together these days, so I am wondering if having a third will really be that big of a change for us. I know sleep will certainly be a challenge, but Jackson hasn't slept much in the past year anyway, so maybe adjusting to a newborn won't be as bad this time around (or maybe that's just wishful thinking).

We also got to turn down ANOTHER chance to find out the sex of this baby. I had placenta previa at my 20-week ultrasound, so we did another one at 33 weeks to make sure it had corrected itself (which it did) and it was SO HARD not to just say, "Ok, fine, tell us!" to the tech and just know. I know it is going to be way more motivating during my labor to not know what it is, but it's hard to have the opportunity and not take it! Haha. (I still FEEL like it's another boy though, for those who are wondering. I really cannot even conceptualize the thought of having a girl, so we will see when D-Day arrives... there are plenty of people who are adament that I am wrong, so we will just have to wait and see!)

I am bummed that we don't have more time to do normal family things. I mean, a typical day for me is something like this: get up before the crack of dawn, eat on the run, kiss my kids and say "bye bye" (this is the hands-down sweetest thing Jackson has learned and having him bid me farewell ALMOST makes it easier to leave them every morning) if they are awake yet and rush off to work. I inevitably get there before everyone else because I want to leave before everyone else. I, especially lately, work my ass off all day long (we recently had another person quit unexpectedly... the person who was supposed to be covering my maternity leave, so the stress level has been off the charts of late), eating "lunch" over the course of the day whenever I can squeeze a bite in, at my desk. At 4 I've put in my 8+ hours and I call it a day and drive home, which now that we are on Parkcenter, it's an extra 10-15 minute commute home, depending on traffic, so I get home with about a half-hour until Stu has to leave for night classes. We eat dinner (quickly) as a family, quick-chat about our day, kiss Daddy goodbye and when normal working mothers would finally have the chance to cool down from the day, I start the pre-bedtime process alone, since Daddy is gone. Then I do homework and try to spend as much time with my kids before their bedtime as possible. I clean up from dinner, try to put something together to take for lunch the next day, shower, and get to bed.

Some days I just want to ignore all of my responsibilities and items that are due (not the least of which is myself upcoming, which I am trying to plan for!) and just do nothing. That Bruno Mars song has become my fantasy mantra, which I've noticed they tend to play on the way home from work. Hmmmm. Unfortunately real life just doesn't work like that, so I keep plugging away, knowing that the proverbial "some day," I will finally finish school, and hopefully life can get marginally less complicated.

So now it's back to homework and time to remind Kaden that we do NOT put items on Jackson's chest, even if it IS funny that "he can't get up now". Tomorrow, we start it all again.

26 Weeks

2011-06-14T22:43:00.003+04:00

I am just AWFUL at blogging! And I really have no excuse. I mean, other than our busy schedules, which are still just as loaded as ever, but that's not exactly NEW, so I just suck! But mostly, things are just kind of boring and unchanging. Jackson and Kaden are growing like freaking weeds! It seems like every day that goes by, one or the other of them are growing out of another pair of pants, or accomplishing a new milestone.

Last night Jackson said "stop" for the first time, adding that to his word list. :) That makes about 6 or so words he can say with intent. He is crawl-running these days and pulls up on EVERYTHING. He is SO close to walking. I have mixed feelings about that one, too. I really want him to walk so that he can be good at it once the new baby comes because I am not sure I can carry a 20-pound baby AND a 10-pound baby around at the same time ALL the time. It seems exhausting and daunting just thinking about it! Lol. Last night I took the kids by myself to meet the family for dinner while Stu was at night class and it was EXHAUSTING. I forget how draining just being pregnant is, then you combine that with carrying an ever-growing boy, and wrangling the other one and suddenly I am sweaty and ready to take a nap and we haven't even left the house yet! :)

Kaden is a freaking hilarious genius these days. He is always one step ahead of me. He's smart, so he has comebacks and arguments ready that stump me and it sucks getting punked by a 3-year-old. Haha. But he makes me laugh all day long with the way he tells stories and his questions that he is CONSTANTLY asking. Right now, his big obsession is time. He wants to know what time we do EVERYTHING, from wake-up to mealtimes to when people come over, and he wants to know the ACTUAL time, not an approximation. He sure is a thinker.

Bean is doing well too. He/she is growing like a weed as well and likes to spend it's days doing somersaults and handsprings in my belly. I am not sure if it is because I already have a baby at home or what, but this pregnancy is FLYING by. It feels like it is at warp speed and I am barely having time to enjoy each new sensation and stage before we are onto the next one. As it is, in a mere two weeks I will enter my third trimester! I am definitely not ready for this one to live on the outside yet when Jackson is still waking up 1-3 times each night for a feeding and/or just to scream for a half hour to an hour. He is the most stubborn baby on earth! But he has the best little personality and I absolutely love spending time with him.

Kaden and Jackson are becoming best friends already. And I LOVE it! I always wanted Kaden to have a sibling so they could be friends, and while Kaden does pick on Jackson from time to time, they are more and more able to actually play with each other and it is so fun to watch!

Stu and I are doing well also. He just started another session of school and has night class 4 nights a week, which is lame, but it also gives me time with my boys all to myself and gets Stu out of the house and conversing with adults, not just people under waist-high. The major downside to this set-up is that we don't get to eat dinner together at all during the week and that is definitely a new struggle since we are used to eating EVERY meal together. We don't get nearly as much time to just chat about our days at the end of the day either, so we've been making up for it by staying up later at night and I feel like that has to end soon too or I will die. Lol.

I am going to school as well, and I get to take my first class WITH Stu, so that is fun as well. It's a pretty easy class, so there is not a lot of stress there either. Work is going well for me too, just trucking along. :)

So that is just about all I have to report as far as our family goes. I have been looking into preschools and I can't believe my baby is even big enough to consider such things! But he is more than ready to "go" to school and he and Daddy have done awesome learning his pre-k material.

Another awesome note, a friend from high school just had her baby this morning! They named him Jett Silas, which I think is a totally badass name and she went to 42+1 weeks, poor woman! She persevered though and waited it out with much more poise than I would have had. :) Congrats to Liz and Jason!

I Love My Boring Life, But...

2011-04-12T18:58:00.004+04:00

So, I really try my very darndest to make sure I keep my little world in check. I try to be kind to my husband (even when he sucks, lol), take care of my kids the best that I am able, be a good friend to those who are good to me, work hard, get good grades, etc. I have my little life, with my immediate family, that we have created, pretty well figured out.

But every time it feels like we are going to catch a break, something throws it out of whack. This past week has been one of the hardest in my memory, and strangely, it has NOTHING to do with me or Stu or our kids (or Jasper!). When things that are so far outside my life effect me, it makes it even harder to know what to do, or how to feel, because there is nothing I can personally do about it.

A few days ago, one of my brother's friends (and a kid I have known since he was little, I knew his Dad well...) sadly chose to take his own life. It has been devastating to the high school kids in my home town right now, and since it was so close to our family, it is almost all I have thought about since it happened. I am confident that if he could have seen the outpouring of support and been able to see what his friends and community have said and felt about him, he never would have done this. But that's what is so heartbreaking about it, there is no going back. I imagine my own kids and the struggles they will face in their lives and it literally hurts my heart for this boy's family to even think a child could be hurting so much that they would think this is the only choice. It makes me hug my own kids a little tighter, and makes me want to remind every kid I see that "it gets better". High school is nothing compared to real life and if you can just stick it out, you'll see how big and opportunistic the world really is. It's just so, so sad...

On top of that, my Jackson has yet another ear infection, so we all got nearly no sleep last week, which only compounded the stress and raw feelings. That poor baby. I feel so bad for him. I can't just explain to him what is going on and I can't comfort him much, it just sucks having a sick baby. Then, there is some more crap that is outside of my control, but well within my realm of pissed off, that is going on in my extended family. I am growing some serious feelings of resentment and raw anger about the issue, but again, there is absolutely nothing I can do. I do have a feeling this is going to completely change my relationship with some people that have loved me since I was tiny, and I am not sure how to deal with it. Especially since, while it seems to be pseudo-public, there is a great deal of secrecy going on and I hate every second of it. Anything that keeps me up at night has no place in my life, but this isn't something I can change or just get rid of. So I am stuck with it it seems. That's uncomfortable to me.

Looks like I am just terrible with change. Heh.

We've also been considering (though leaning toward the "no" side) going back to the UAE again. There are nearly no jobs to be had here (that can support our family) and we are running out of options to ever move forward (with our lives)to anywhere than stuck where we are. (I believe it was William Blake that said non-movement was the ultimate fall of man...) People say that we're in a good place for our age, etc, but the day-in, day-out process of never moving forward while I miss my kids growing up is very hard for me. I doubt we will go (especially with the unrest and radiation, etc that is going on over there right now), but it is difficult to be able to quadruple our yearly income, while enabling ME to stay home with our kids, and not take that opportunity. I am sure we will keep you posted.

In the meantime, here's hoping things can get back to some semblance of normal and things outside my control can stop rocking my boat.

And Baby Makes FIVE.

2011-03-22T23:05:00.003+04:00

I suck at life! I can't believe it has been more than two months since I last blogged! To my credit, schools has simply sucked this semester and I can't stand a single class I have (which has made me decide to change my major yet again... take THAT Education!)

More than that, though, we have dealt with a long line of sickness and exhaustion. Jackson was sick with an ear infection and RSV for over a month and then Kaden and myself got sick as well and I felt like death. We have also been sleep deprived for the better part of a month dealing with Jackson, who, like his Mommy, sucks at sleeping, and we just can't get a break with him at night. After waking up close to ten times the night before, thankfully he only woke up once last night and went back to sleep pretty easily, so I did get a bit more sleep.

So, the big news that everyone else has heard, but hasn't hit the blog yet is that I am 14 weeks pregnant with baby number three. :) I think we are going to wait to find out the gender until it is born... if I can stand it! Haha.

In other news, Kaden is growing more and more everyday and he is just hilarious and smart. This morning I was getting ready for work in a sleep-deprived haze and I said, "Hey buddy, have you seen Mommy's boots?" And he goes, "Yep, they are in your room by your bed." Sure enough, they were in my room by my bed. What a little memory he has!

Jackson is soooo close to learning how to crawl. He gets up on all fours and hops his knees forward, so all he has to learn to do is move one hand and knee at the same time and he will be all set. He says ma-ma and da-da and still can say "no", silly guy. He also waves bye-bye now and definitely understands a lot of words I say to him. I can't believe my tiny baby is already 8 months old! It feels like it is going even faster this time around!

Well, that's about all that's new from us. Stu and I are still plugging away slowly but surely at school and I'm still busting my ass for pennies at my job... but I do like it. :)

I almost forgot to add: For my Nonfiction Writing class, I have been working feverishly on an essay about the Cesarean Epidemic in America... as part of the assignment, I made this video about VBAC as a subset of the article I am writing. Enjoy. :)

Welcoming 2011.

2011-01-06T22:05:00.003+04:00

Time off is so great. I got 10 whole days off of work and any other committments to spend with all my boys and it was so nice to have the time. Christmas was awesome and my boys got more toys than they needed, and I got a KitchenAid mixer! Woohoo. Stu also got me a ton of Bronco stuff and then we spent the rest of the time off watching The Pacific, which was one of his presents from me. All-in-all, a very good holiday and time off. I am not thrilled to be back at work, but I guess time off can't last forever. :)

School starts again on the 18th, so we are just getting ready to be beyond busy again. I think Stu is pretty bored these days with no school and just watching the boys, but he will have a full schedule once classes start again.

Here is a picture of all our loot from Christmas! (And a few more from Christmas morning) :) We spent Christmas dinner over at Marcia and Deven's.

My handsome boys!

Kaden as Ironman!

Jackson sure liked his Christmas outfit. :)

Christmas Eve.

2010-12-25T09:03:00.004+04:00

I was off work starting on Thursday and that night we got to go on our helicopter Christmas lights tour! Kaden had even more fun than I'd hoped and if he was afraid (tight grip and all), he never showed it one bit. He was so brave and climbed right up in that seat and got his headset on without a single problem. He held my hand (quite tightly) the entire ride, but was chatting and excited the entire trip. Sadly, we thought we got the whole thing on video, but when we got back to the car, Stu realized he had it on standby and not on record, so we only got a little like ten second clip. But we have the memories and a single great pic of Kaden ready to take off with his headset on, so that will do! :) He keeps asking if he can go back on the helicopter, so hopefully we will be able to do it again... maybe next year, :)

Tonight, we took the kids out to dinner at Red Lobster and they were little angels. Jackson busied himself with his book and laying on the seat beside me to eat his bottle, and Kaden colored and read the appetizer menu. I love that I feel comfortable and confident taking my kids out in public because I know they will almost always be so good. We had planned it perfectly for right after nap for both of them, so Jackson didn't even get grumpy until we were on the way home from a Wal-Mart stop after we ate. It was great!

We are just so thrilled for Santa to come tonight! Kaden is at the perfect age for wonder and amazement and his questions just thrill me to the core. I love sharing his glee and reliving my own excitement I felt as a child for Santa's impending arrival. Even thought he's been in bed for over an hour, if he's anything like me, he is still awake thinking about Santa and if the reindeer will like the carrots we left for them. My sweet little guys.

Tomorrow we will begin our day with gifts and a breakfast casserole I put together tonight (WAY easier than making breakfast! :)) and then we will end it at Aunt Marcia and Uncle Deven's for dinner and presents. I never thought I could love Christmas anymore... then suddenly I found myself the parent of a 3-year-old.

May your Christmas be as full as ours!

20 Years.

2010-12-22T19:17:00.002+04:00

What a great day yesterday was! I got to go to a surprise party for my former boss, who has been with the AG's office for 20 years now! I think it is awesome that such a dedicated attorney would stay for so many years in civil service, when he could easily go off and make 3 or 4 (or more) times what he makes at the state if he went with a private firm. But that's just the kind of guy he is, moral to the core. It was so nice to get to see all of my old coworkers and get a tour of their new office, which is so much newer and cleaner feeling than the basement we used to be stuffed into. I also got a chance to catch up with my favorite people from that office and exchanged promises to get together. :)

Then, when I got home from that, I made breakfast sandwiches for dinner (take THAT McDonald's!) and then we all got bundled up and headed out for a drive to look at Christmas lights. Last year Kaden was pretty confused and was mostly just tired, but this year he was so excited and kept saying, "On my side now!"... "Now on Mom's side!" when we would pass good houses. It was a blast. Jackson snoozed for most of it and then woke up just in time to go home, without too much fussing. So all-in-all, a very successful lights-seeing night. :)

Because it isn't a secret anymore (thanks, Deven's drugs! lol), I might as well divulge that one of Stu and Kaden's presents this year from Mommy is a helicopter Christmas lights tour! We are going tomorrow night and I am so excited to take my little buddy on his first (and Mommy and Daddy's first also) helicopter ride! I am really hoping he doesn't freak out and that we all have a great time, because it sounds so freaking cool! Lol.

After Christmas lights we finished our evening cuddling for a bit on the couch, me indulging in some gifted homemade Kahlua and milk. Yummmm.

Tonight is the MAACO bowl and I am so excited to watch my Broncos take on the Utes! Go! Orange! Go Big Blue! Fight! Fight! B-S-U!

Weekend Bliss!

2010-12-21T00:32:00.002+04:00

WHAT an amazing weekend we had! Mimi and Papa surprised us by flying into town without notice so we got to spend the whole weekend with them and Marcia and Deven (and Company) making cookies, eating, hanging out and laughing. It was great, and definitely worth the surprise!

Saturday morning I woke up to Stu telling me Marcia wanted us to head over the make cookies before it got too late and Kaden needed to nap and that she was going to make breakfast items, so I got up and got dressed and we headed over. Marcia told Kaden that there was a surprise upstairs and that he should go get it and bring it down to us. He readily agreed and I guessed that they had gotten us something Christmas-y, like one of those blow-up lawn ornaments or something and his squeal of delight made me imagine they had already blown it up upstairs. Instead, down he comes with Mimi and Papa in tow! I was so excited and felt instant relief because I'd been fretting over the fact that we wouldn't be able to see them for several more months and Jackson and Kaden just keep growing so fast, so I did the only rational thing... I cried like a baby! :)

We spent the whole weekend just having so much fun that of course it went by WAY too fast, but was so nice. Kaden found out that his great grandpa is SANTA and he was soooo excited! We got to take pictures with a Santa that they know and love, so we didn't get any of those terrified kid pics, which is nice. Haha.

I also got to finish my Christmas shopping this weekend with Marcia and Mimi which is infinitely better than alone, though the crowds were nuts and exhausting. It was too bad they had to leave so quickly, but I am so glad they came! Here are some pics from the weekend.

Jackson showing off Grandad's skillz in the crib he made for Kaden.

Papa and Jackson looking at each other during meal time.

Kisses for Papa! Sweet baby.

Kaden and Jackson on the only REAL Santa's lap.

Jackson and Mimi share a sweet moment together.

Working..... out.

2010-12-16T20:45:00.002+04:00

I have had a really hard time losing the baby weight this time around and I think that is partly because it has only been 4 months and partly because I. HAVE. NO. TIME.

The last 4 months have consisted of me working full time, going to school, and then rushing home to eat and hang out with my kids for a little while before they have to go to bed, and then the next day we did it all over again. Now that school is officially over as of Tuesday, I am able to come home right from work and not have to worry about homework deadlines or upcoming tests, so I can just be with my boys. But that also means that I have no more excuses to avoid working out...

...That STILL doesn't mean that I have any motivation to. I got on the elliptical last night and after about 5 minutes I thought I might actually have a heart attack and die in my kids' playroom. But, alas, I survived and today, I feel sore, but good. So maybe I can put this into my routine without too much grief. :) Still doesn't mean I WANT to.

I mean, let's be honest, would YOU want to waste your time working out if you had these faces to play with as an alternative???

I didn't think so.

Damn you, Facebook!

2010-12-14T21:36:00.002+04:00

Ok, so I have recently gotten back in touch with a few people I haven't talked to in years and one of them mentioned that they "still read your blog" and I felt so bad! What a horrible blogger I have become! So I am going to try to blog every day for a while (we'll see how it goes). Even if it is just something simple, because the reason I stopped blogging is both that I post everything anyone would ever want to know on Facebook (and the photo upload time is shorter) and because I always feel like I don't have enough to say to warrant opening up a whole new blog. So I just don't. And that makes me lame. SO I am really going to try to get better again! So daily blogging until I can get back into the hang of it again!

Today I have my math final and I am terrified. Suddenly my math teacher completely changed the way he was grading (as evidenced by my test scores going from a 91 and 100%s to 60 and 65s). My final is worth 20% of my grade and this should be the last math class I ever have to take (provided that I don't change my major again). I have to score above a 50% to pass the class, but after the last two tests, that seems up in the air. I have no idea what the test will cover because he refused to go over it with us. I just feel like my hands are really tied AND I am pissed that my GPA is going to be affected because some douchebag* with tenure is having an end-life crisis (it can't be mid-life unless he's an elf because he is like 400 years old).

I am also turning in my Ed-CIFS final today (my teacher was MIA yesterday, even though I've had it done for days) so after 3 PM I am DONE with this semester! (And will have no real reason NOT to blog then, see??? :))

Anyway, Jackson is growing like a weed and is a big boy 4-month-old now and just cut his first tooth this past weekend. Kaden is my little intuitive genius and has a huge heart. I just love watching him grow and develop. We ALL can't wait for Christmas... stay tuned for some surprises coming up soon!

*(And no, spellchecker, douchebag is spelled correctly.)

End of Summer.

2010-09-27T21:45:00.003+04:00

He have had such a great summer and I am so sad to see it go. Most recently we went to a kickass wedding, the play The Woman in Black (totally freaky), and watched Bronco Football. :) Here are some recent pics from the Fox Household:

Mommy and Daddy out with grown-ups!

Mommy and Jackson enjoying some quiet time.

Kaden painting at Art in the Park.

Jack-Jack showing off his bling-bling.

Chillin' in Mommy and Daddy's bed!

Cyber Parenting.

2010-09-27T21:10:00.003+04:00

I know what a bad blogger I am, but it isn't that I forget to blog. It's that I REALLY have nothing worth blogging about! I open a blank blogger page every so often, but then I just sit there and stare at it. I don't want to blog nonsense, so I figured I'd wait until I had something more than, "I love my kids! Now here's some pics of them!" to say. And I found it. :)

My aunt posted a blog about Parenting By Text, which I found both profoundly amusing (remembering the days my own Mom used to scream for one of us and we'd come running) and also eerily foreboding. "Is this a peek into my future???" I would be kidding myself if I didn't acknowledge that in this day and age, I too will be texting my boys to see where they are, or asking them to complete a chore. Heck, I do it already with my husband. And I am definitely guilty of texting someone in the same room I'm in, if what I have to say isn't polite for mixed company. But it's just odd how much things have changed in just 10 years or so.

And I'm also deeply grateful for technology because each day I can watch my boys via webcam while I am at work. I minimize the webcam screen and carry on with work, but when I miss them or wonder what they are up to, instead of having to guess, I can pull the screen back up and see for myself. :) This morning I got to watch Kaden working on his preschool (the letter E!) and Jackson cry, rock in his bouncy chair, and eat. I love technology.

Kaden working on the Letter E.

Jackson snuggling with Daddy.

Preschool and Haircut

2010-09-04T00:36:00.004+04:00

After seeing how expensive preschool is here and the waiting lists associated with the good ones, Stu and I decided to start "homeschooling" Kaden. Here he is learning his ABCs! :)

Oh. I also wanted to mention how hard it is going from the roll of just "Mom" for 6 weeks and then getting back into the swing of working again. So, to help my self-esteem, since I was going back to work an only marginally smaller belly than I left with, heh, I got a massive haircut! This is the shortest my hair has been since I was 19 and lived with Mimi and Papa! :) It also meant that there was a LOT of hair on the floor after the haircut with as thick as my hair is. So I had to take some pics. :)

But it didn't go to waste, there is an organization that takes old hair and makes mats out of them that soak up the spilled oil in the Gulf, so that was pretty cool. My hair went to a good cause at least! :)

And I have actually done my hair and worn it down EVERY day since I got it cut, which was last Thursday, and was definitely a first for me. :) I love it!

And an adorable one of my sweets. :)

Six Weeks Later.

2010-09-04T00:29:00.002+04:00

Boy has time flown since Jackson was born! I can't believe it's already been 6 whole weeks since he joined our family! A lot has happened since then too, which should explain why I have continued to be a terrible blogger, but if we’re being honest, the real reason is Facebook. I post everything anyone needs to know there including pictures, so I forget to update here as well. I would like to continue here too so I can look back and read this from time to time like I do of our time in the Middle East.

So let’s do a quick recap: Jackson and I came home the day after he was born and settled into life with two kids. It was easier this time around both because I was up on my feet almost immediately, and because Stu and I were both completely off from work and school for 5 weeks after he was born, so we had ample time to get used to our new life and work out the way we had to adjust.

When Jackson was two weeks old, he took his first airplane ride! He and I flew to Spokane (Coeur d’Alene) while Kaden and Stu (and Jasper) drove up. We flew both because I wasn’t sure how long I could comfortably sit in a car a mere two weeks after blowing out my vagina, and because I wasn’t sure how good of a traveler Jackson would be, so we opted to fly.

He was a perfect angel baby traveler on the flight. He fell asleep right before I left the house and then didn’t wake up until we pulled into the driveway at my Mom’s house! He even slept through me getting him out of and back into his carseat when we went through security. Champ baby. I didn’t know what to do with myself though. I got lunch and listened to my ipod. I was so traumatized after my last flight experience (don't remember? Click here.) that I had expected for the worst and got the best! It was awesome.

We spent two weeks at my Mom and Dad’s house, which was great. The whole family got to come by and meet Jackson and spend time with him and I had plenty of free babysitting! :) We frequented the famous Hudson’s Hamburgers in downtown Boise and took in the beauty of the city. We went hiking with my siblings and out on the boat and of course, the point of the trip, we had the Pig Pickin’. And Jackson got his own “Pig Pickin” onesie just like Kaden’s from Aunt Mo! We all had a great time, but of course had to go home eventually. We got back to Boise on August 18th and then started school the following Monday.

Stuie and I at the Pig Pickin.

Sweet sleepy baby.

Such a proud big brother!

This Monday (a week later), I went back to work and I definitely have mixed feeling about being here. Part of me is glad to have something expected of me every day, but mostly I just find myself missing my babies and wishing I was at home instead.

One thing I have realized is that it is a LOT harder to lose the weight this time around. Last time it kind of fell off fairly easily and I just had to wait for my skin to shrink again. This time, there is still tons of fat and nothing fits. Talk about depressing. Plus I’m up at 6 AM after 2 middle-of-the-night feedings, minimum, then I work until lunch, have class for an hour, work again till 4:30 then have class again till 6. I get home at 6:30 (and that doesn’t count finding time for online class time), rush around eating, getting stuff ready for the next day, packing lunch, etc., then finally try to relax and enjoy time with my boys before I rush off to bed around 10 and do it all over again. It’s super tiring, when in the world am I supposed to work out too? Ugh. So we’ll have to wait and see how this weight-loss thing goes.

Anyway, that’s about it from us. Now that we are working/school every day, we’re not doing a whole lot, but eventually this semester will be over too and we’ll have that many more credits under our belts. Slow progress is still progress. :)

Me and my pretty baby. :)

Jackson William's Birth Story

2010-07-22T23:20:00.004+04:00

I have been waiting so long to write this post! I have even imagined what my own personal outcome would have been and “written” it in my head a hundred times. Now, I am so happy to say, I get to write my real story.

Jackson’s birth story actually begins with his older brother’s. During my first pregnancy, I was more interested in what was happening inside of me, with my growing baby, than with how he would come out. I didn’t know it was something I needed to learn about. I thought babies were just born and that was that. I now know it’s a lot more complicated than that, and after agreeing to be induced with Kaden, (ultimately a failed induction) each intervention from artificial rupture of membranes to internal monitors, to Pitocin, and eventually to a c-section for fetal distress, all could possibly have been avoided with a little more knowledge going in.

So when I got pregnant with Jackson I knew I wanted to VBAC. My mom had VBACed 3 babies after she’d had me my c-section, I didn’t think it would be a big deal. Then I started researching and talking to people, and I realized the concept of VBAC was a lot more foreign than I expected. After reading countless books (probably 15) and making my poor husband watch DVDs and read birth stories, not only had I become convinced that I wanted to VBAC, but I’d become an advocate for it in general. So many people I talked to were completely ignorant about the risks of VBAC. I heard more than once things like, “My doctor wants me to have a repeat c-section because I could die in a VBAC attempt” (not true, sometimes babies die in VBAC attempt, there are no statistics about maternal death rate associated with VBAC… moms die on the operating table) and “I’ve had 2 c-sections so I can’t have a VBAC now”.

Then I hit the 40 week mark in my pregnancy. I never really thought I would go to 40 weeks, honestly. I had polyhydramnios, which basically just means too much amniotic fluid, and I guess I just assumed I would (quite literally) pop before then. But 40 weeks I hit and my doctor, while still supportive of VBAC, said at 41 weeks we would need to start induction options. Surely I wouldn’t get to 41 weeks.

Thursday, July 15^th

I got checked and had a membrane sweep done. I was 2 cm and 75% effaced, -2 station. After having tried EVERY means of getting him out on my own, including every hare-brained idea anyone threw at me (Castor oil three times, eggplant Parmesan twice, walking for miles, sex as often as possible, nipple stimulation, red raspberry leaf tea since 30 weeks, evening primrose oil since 34 weeks, etc), I was really hoping the membrane sweep would work wonders and I’d have my baby soon.

Saturday, July 17^th

Kaden’s birthday was July 21^st and since it looked like this baby might actually gestate forever, I decided to go ahead and plan his birthday party, and then if it needed to be moved, we’d move it. (Really, I was hoping Murphy’s law would force me to cancel it and we could have a baby instead.) So we had friends over and celebrated my little man become a big boy 3-year-old. I had been having contractions for at least a week, including several hours’ worth after the Castor oil attempts, but they would all eventually peter out in the wee hours of the morning and I would pass out from exhaustion and start the day again.

I talked with my doctor again and we agreed to an early morning induction with Pitocin at a 1 to see if anything could be jump started. I was adamant that I wanted to keep my waters intact and try no other forms of induction if this one didn’t work. My doc agreed that if after several hours nothing was happening, we’d just go home and try again another day.

Sunday, July 18^th

Stu woke me up at 6:30 after I’d managed to set my alarm wrong and overslept my a half-hour, so I didn’t have time to worry or fret before going to the hospital because we were rushing around trying to get out of the door and make it on time. We got there at 7:06 am, which was pretty good for being so late getting up, and we got right in and got my IV placed and hooked up the external monitors.

My nurse, Kelly, was amazing and a Natural Childbirth advocate, as requested in my birth plan. She told me about her 3 kids’ labors (one drug-free, one an epidural delivery, and the last a c-section) and she completely understood why I wanted a VBAC. In all of my research, I’d quickly realized that the best chance of achieving a VBAC was to do so as drug-and-intervention-free as possible, so my birth plan was pretty simple, “stay away from me.” Kelly checked me before starting the Pit and I was about the same as the last check in the doctor’s office.

We had agreed to go up by 1 increment every half hour until I had a good contraction pattern going and then try turning it off to see if my body would take over on it’s own. When I was at 2 units the contractions really started to pick up and I could tell they were finally consistent and by 3 units I needed Stu’s help to feel comfortable through them. He was pushing on my hips through them and that felt amazing.

At around 10 am, I felt a contraction starting and I told Stu to “come push” on my hips and as soon as he started pressing, I felt and heard this huge POP and suddenly water was rushing down my legs. I started laughing and said, “You just broke my water!” We called the nurse to let her know and we all had a good laugh every time she would tell another new person that “her husband broke her water at about 10 am.”

My Mom arrived sometime around 11 and contractions had really started to get more intense. Jackson’s heartrate was not looking as good as they like to see, he was having some late decels after contractions, and no accelerations at all. Kelly said this was because my placenta was just done and the baby needed to come out, hopefully sooner than later. We turned off the Pitocin at this point and it never went back on.

I labored for the next few hours making slow progress from 4-6 cm. I utilized the jacuzzi tub, which was wonderful except that I couldn’t sit on my butt during contractions so my knees and legs got sore pretty quickly. Then getting out of the tub sucked because suddenly my heavy belly was my burden once again without he benefit of the water helping it float.

I got back to my room and alternated between hands and knees over the back of the bed, side-lying with modified squats, and standing up leaning on the bed (this and over the back of the bed were my favorites). But Jackson kept having heartrate decels and by the time I hit 7 cm, I was just DONE with dealing with the pain combined with nurses and the hospitalist (OB) telling me I needed to get an internal fetal scalp electrode monitor on my baby because they couldn’t tell how healthy he was. All I heard, while trying to deal with the pain is, “This is the first step in the interventions that are going to ultimately lead to you getting cut open again.” I felt like my body was a failure, my dreams of holding my goopy baby on my chest were dashed, and also that something really may be wrong with my baby and that if I refused the monitor, I might be saying, “ a vaginal delivery is more important to me than a healthy baby.” My doctor is a family practitioner, and more calm and collected than your typical OB and he was arguing with her about whether we could wait. She was a raging bitch and said that if we were refusing now, we needed to signed an informed refusal, and Stu told them to go get it. After 10 people were in my room, stressing me out, and also that nagging worry about my baby, I finally relented and got the internal monitor.

When I got checked again, I was still at about a 7 and I just couldn’t deal with the pain anymore, so I asked for (demanded) the epidural. Poor Stu, who had been listening to me preach for months about how I wanted a drug-free birth was not as easy to convince that I REALLY wanted the drugs, lol. Poor guy. He didn’t want me to be mad at him later for letting me give in. But I knew then, like I know now, that going drug-free was never about being a crunchy hear-me-roar she-woman, it was about increasing the chances of having a safe, healthy VBAC. With as much pain as I was in, I doubted that it was healthy for either me or my baby at that point and I figured being able to relax some would help my body open up those last few centimeters and have my baby.

Actually getting the epidural was Hell. I had to hold still during some seriously horrible contractions, and wondered why in God’s name I hadn’t asked for it when they were still just this side of manageable. But it got placed and I finally got some relief. It was a perfect epi too, because I could still feel my whole body and I could get up and move around on the bed (hands and knees again was my favorite and what the baby’s heartrate preferred too, so I was there a LOT), but I could finally get some relief of the pain.

I got checked and was at a “stretchy 8” with one side of my cervix completely gone and the other side “a little puffy”. Jackson’s heartrate never really liked my contractions at all, and at this point, about 16 hours into labor, we just really needed to get things moving. So I agreed to an internal contraction monitor (at that point my birth plan was so far gone, and I already had so many things up there, I figured, what’s one more wire?). The contractions proved to be good and strong and eventually I got to 10 cm and was ready to push.

Now, everyone had been telling me that pushing was better than just contractions because, “you actually get to do something” and that it didn’t hurt as bad because you were working with your body to make progress. They were liars. Pushing was the most painful part of the whole ordeal for me. Every single urge to push was evil, evil holy-shit pain. I started pushing at about 1 am and wasn’t making as good of progress as my doctor had hoped. (That’s because it hurt like a bitch and the epi couldn’t even touch it, so I think I was fighting my body and holding back some when I was pushing). But about an hour into it, doctor Shappard called the hospitalist in for a consultation (who was mercifully a NEW doctor by that time, one who got along great with my doc, and wasn’t prone to rash decisions) and I heard them say, “possible vacuum extraction” and that got my attention. I could hear, as well as anyone else could see, that the fetal heartrate was getting worse with each push and as he descended, his heartrate was worse and wasn’t recovering. Once again I panicked and had visions of having made it this far, about 20 hours of labor, only to end up in another emergency c-section. So with every contraction, I pushed my very hardest. Stu was yelling at me, my Mom was saying she could see his head, and Kristin was holding my hand (poor girl probably had bruises) and eventually with as much effort as I could possibly give, his head came out. A tiny push later and I felt his whole body slither out. What a strange and cool feeling! He was immediately placed on my belly, but he had a tight nuchal cord around his neck and body, without enough slack, so I held him under his arms and back toward my doctor so he could get the cord off his neck. Stu cut the cord pretty quickly, but because he had passed meconium and with the nuchal cord, the NICU team was there to assess him. They had to work a little bit to get him to breathe, but eventually I got my baby back while my doc stitched me up (also Hell).

It turned out that in addition to the tight nuchal cord, his head was also presenting transverse, and in a different direction than his body, so that’s what made getting him out so hard. I ended up with a third degree perineal tear and a couple of skid marks, so the repair took quite a bit of time. I got to hold my baby though and it was so awesome because when they brought him to me he was crying and I said, “Don’t cry, baby, Mommy’s here.” And he immediately stopped crying and looked around until he found me and then just stared at me while I talked to him. It was like he really knew who I was and was comforted by just my voice.

Jackson and Dr. Shappard

He was born at 3:13 am and weighed in at 6 pounds, 7 ounces, 20 inches long. After the excitement of getting to meet him died down I realized, “Oh my God, I just got my VBAC!” I was up to go to the bathroom within an hour of having him (I wasn’t up for the first 2 days after my c-section) and we were released from the hospital on Tuesday morning. While recovering has still certainly been a challenge, I am doing things I couldn’t do after WEEKS after my c-section. My downstairs DOES hurt and I have been using ice packs like they’re going out of style, but there is really no comparison to the recovery from major abdominal surgery.

My wonderful husband was the best support I could have asked for. He was there with me every single minute I needed him to be and was encouraging and sweet throughout the whole process. (He was even polite to the nurses and doctors, which I never expected, lol). He got me a ring that has two hearts and my boys’ birthstones, and a necklace that has two hearts to signify my boys. :)

Bad Blogger :(

2010-06-25T21:55:00.005+04:00

I seriously doubt anyone even reads this anymore! I can't believe I haven't blogged since APRIL! Sheesh. And here I thought I'd keep on blogging just as frequently when I was back in the States. Fail.

Anyway, it is definitely high time for an update then, huh?

Let's see, what has been going on since April? We might as well start with a photo montage because not only have I not blogged in months, but this blog hasn't included pictures in even longer.

Mommy and Kaden seesawed. :)

We took the kids to the zoo.

Our backyard flooded and we got a temporary pond (with ducks!)

My Dad and Maddison came down to Boise for a race weekend and we got to go see her. Kaden thought she was awesome and we all had a great time.

Then, Kaden, Stu and I drove over to Seattle for Memorial Day Weekend, which was pretty great except that it rained the whole time we were there (but it was Seattle, so it gets a pass :)).

Mo and Co. threw a baby shower for me, which was so great because I got to see so many people from my childhood (and their now-adult children!). We really enjoyed it.

Stu had never been to Seattle, so we had to do the typical tourist things like Pike Place Market, which was super crowded, and we also took the ferry over the Bremerton with Mimi and Papa and that was a freaking blast. We saw an old Navy ship while Kaden hung out with Mimi and Papa at the street fair and then we all ate lunch at Anthony's, which was the best seafood I've had in a long time. Afterwards, Kaden and Papa were pooped. :)

Me on the ferry on the way to Bremerton with Seattle's skyline in the background.

Stu on the top bunk of one of the beds on the ship.

Sleepy sleepy Papa and Kaden. :)

As far as current events go, I had my baby shower in June, courtesy of the wonderful Miss Kristin, and it was awesome. It was so nice to see so many people come out to support us and our new little Nugget. We still haven't picked a name for this one, but we feel confident that when we meet him, we'll finally be able to settle on the right one (this is me using positive thinking... it's our last-ditch effort to find a freaking name, and if we still don't have one then, "Nugget" is going on the birth certificate and he can name himself later. :))

Other than that, we've just been trying to stay busy as these last few weeks of pregnancy sure can be slow. It's been getting pretty nice here lately and we're trying to enjoy the weather, and having only one child, as much as we can. I can't believe in just a few short weeks my baby is going to be a big brother and we are going to be a family of 4!! :)

So here is one for the road... my latest belly shot, taken yesterday right at 38 weeks. :) Everything is looking good and we are both very healthy, so we're just waiting for him to decide he's done incubating so we can meet him!

Canada Says: Vaginal Birth Better for Breech Babies.

2010-04-09T20:08:00.002+04:00

I am pretty sure only Sarah will care about this as much as I do, but this is a great step in the right direction for normal childbirth and eliminating unnecessary c-sections.

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/health/c-section-not-best-option-for-breech-birth/article1186104/

Ultrasound # 4

2010-04-08T22:57:00.002+04:00

The results came back good! We're back to normal levels of fluid in there and Bump looks healthy as usual. The only slightly weird thing was that last night around 1 AM I started having contractions (not Braxton Hicks for those who have been prego before and know the difference). They kept waking me up and were quite uncomfortable. I had them all morning too and of course, right before my appointment, they magically disappeared. Lol. She said she could see some light effacement of my cervix, but to keep an eye on them and if they get bad again, I'll just have to come back in and we'll worry about it then. I'm 28 weeks now, so even just a few more weeks would be great and then if he really wanted to come, he could without much worry. But not quite yet. :)

I have a follow-up Ultrasound in another 3 weeks to check the fluid levels again, but hopefully if they are good then, we'll be good to go for the rest of the pregnancy. :)

Car Accident and Easter Weekend.

2010-04-07T00:23:00.004+04:00

Alright, so I figured I'd better post here before I don't want to anymore. For those who have somehow not heard, Stu, Kaden and I got into a car accident on Wednesday of last week. We had just finished eating dinner and Kaden was a really good boy and ate all of his vegetables so we decided to go get ice cream real quick at Dairy Queen. Kaden wanted to take "Aunt Mommy's Car" (yeah, apparently we have had too many aunts around lately, as I've suddenly become one, lol) but I wasn't feeling like it and Daddy wanted to drive so we opted to take his truck instead (thank God).

We were barely a block from our house when, a few cars a ahead of us, a person was waiting to turn left across rush-hour traffic so we all came to a stop. Suddenly there was this screeching noise of brakes behind us and then "BOOM!" A guy in a three-quarter-ton suburban behind us decided NOT to brake and to plow right into us, sending us into the car in front of us, and them into the car in front of them. The guy ahead of THAT car was the one waiting to turn and he pulled off to call 911.

Wrecks are crazy. It's like your brain is on super speed because I remember EVERY detail so oddly clearly. I remember putting my hands out in front of me when I hit the dash and that I was turning my head toward the noise when he hit us (making for some KILLER whiplash a few days later, ugh). But mostly, as SOON as it happened, I turned around as fast as I could and all but shrieked, "ARE YOU OK?" to Kaden. That, of course, DID freak him out, and he started crying. I whipped off my seatbelt and jumped out to get in the back with him and check him out.

At that point, the driver of the suburban tried to jump out and talk to Stu, apologizing and saying he didn't know what happened, etc. And Stu said, "Not right now, dude. I have a kid and my wife in the car." Then he came around to my side as I opened Kaden's door to check on him (I was already crying) and he said, "Oh my God, and you're pregnant!" I jumped in back and looked at Kaden and by that time he had calmed down from Mommy's freak out and I realized he was okay, so I think my mind took over and did a mental inventory and suddenly realized I didn't feel quite right. I started shaking from the adrenaline and then started crying even harder. From the time we lived in Abu Dhabi, getting into a wreck with Kaden has ALWAYS been my worst fear. I kept thinking things like, "We almost took my Prius." And imagining what such a vehicle would have done to MY car and my baby, who was closest to the impact. (I freak out a little more.) Then I thought, "Poor truck." We've only had it for three months, and what a good little truck, the crumple zones worked perfectly and we were all okay as a result. Stu came over to me and convinced me to sit back in the truck since I was shaking really bad and I kept saying I didn't feel right.

That's about when the contractions started and I started to evaluate what had just happened. I was just hit by a vehicle going about 40 mph and slammed into another vehicle. Imagining what that had to look like inside my body, I realized that most of the force of the wreck was across my lower abdomen where my seatbelt had kept me in my seat, but where I had a bruise on my leg from it smacking into the dash along with my hands. So my growing baby took most of the force. Great. Before I had too long to process this, the ambulance arrived and Kaden told me "Iss ok, Mommy. Be happy." Sweet boy. Everyone agreed that the safest place for me at that point was in the hospital, where they could check on my and my baby and make sure all is well.

Marcia got there just as we were about to leave and rode with me in the ambulance while Stu and Kaden came in Deven's car. Talk about a long and bumpy ride! I can't imagine having a severed limb, or some sort of ailment where jarring movements would be painful, and having to take that ride.

We got there and I got hammered with questions about the wreck while they took my vitals and then the bitchy nurse stabbed me with a saline lock. Luckily, we got there right around shift change and by the time I got back from getting x-rays done, I had a new, wonderful nurse who said he could draw my blood from my IV and not have to stick me again. I could have kissed him. He was right, bless him, and got enough of my blood (like 3 gallons!) that the waiting phlebotomist just had to take it and be on his merry way (which means we got along great).

All along they kept telling me that as soon as I was checked out, they would get me up to labor and delivery, where I might possibly be kept for 4-6 hours of observation. At LEAST two hours later (I will spare you my experience) I finally made it up to L&D where I knew they'd want me to give them a urine sample. I waddled my way into the bathroom to finally be relieved when Stu announced that my dreams of a 4 hours observation were severely dashed. I came out to meet the wonderful Dr. Kilpatrick who informed me that with a wreck going that fast and with contractions and light bleeding, my butt wasn't going anywhere for at least 24 hours, possibly more. Ugh.

So we got a hold of Marcia and I got to direct her around my house over the phone describing where to find such necessities as my toothbrush and my sports bra (a dire need). I had to endure an "exam" (that's all I'll say for those squeamish types, lol) that I think I behaved very well for if I do say so myself. :) And then Stu and I got to watch our second Ultrasound, which was a million times better than the first, even with the circumstances, and she gave us some adorable new pics, including a "money shot" of our boy, which the last tech refused to give us (or even confirm that he WAS a boy).

Marcia arrived with my stuff and Stu had to say goodbye (the un-fun part about having one child at home already... no more overnight stays in the hospital together, lol). I killed time by discussing the merits of VBACs with my nurse and doctor, who informed me that I was "way too connected" when I combated all her "risks" with research. She was great and laughed and stayed with me for a long time before I finally decided I'd better call it a night. My lovely nurse produced an Ambien and I tried to sleep. I ened up getting about 5 hours total, with one interruption to move the doppler that was refusing to pick up my son's heartbeat.

The next day, Dr. Bobrowski, the head of high-risk obstetrics at St. Alphonsus, came in to talk to me about my Ultrasound. She told me I had high amniotic fluid in the Ultrasound they did the night before and that they would be doing another one to check it out. Between that time, I got on Google and did a ton of research and discovered that it is called hydramnios and that typically, fluid levels should be between 5 and 20 centimeters and that anything over 25 is considered high. I was measuring around 30 centimeters. They did another Ultrasound and this time I was measuring around 35. She said if I got to 40, they would be really concerned and that I may have to be admitted FOR THE DURATION OF MY PREGNANCY. Wow.

The interesting thing about hyramnios is that they often don't know why it happens. I asked if the wreck could have caused it and she said it potentially could have because they really don't know. We set to ruling out the other possible causes, which are an Rh blood incompatibility, which could have been plausible because I am A negative and Stu and Kaden are both B positive, so the likelihood that this baby is Rh positive too is quite high. They did a screen that my Mom explained to me using big words, but basically it is where they take 6 slides and make sure there is no baby blood cells along with the Mommy blood cells. So we ruled that out. I got my Rho-gam shot anyway to protect him against my mean blood cells, should any of his blood get in my system.

The other common cause is Gestational Diabetes, but they gave me a glucose tolerance test and my blood work came back fine on that too.

The next is fetal abnormalities, but throughout both Ultrasounds they did a full, detailed anatomy scan of the baby and the doctor told me, "You have a textbook normal baby". So now I go back in a week from then (this Thursday) to have another follow-up Ultrasound done to see if the fluid levels have changed at all. Hopefully nothing ends up being wrong and we can finish this pregnancy without much issue.

I got to go home after Dr. Shappard (MY doctor) gave me the go-ahead, but not before we discovered the big irony of the whole thing. He said his neighbor got in a wreck yesterday and that he was towing his SUBURBAN home while my doctor was outside playing with his kids. Stu asked him if it was blue and Dr. Shappard's eyes bugged out of his head and threw his hands up over his mouth in shock. Stu showed him the picture of the vehicle on his phone and then he confirmed the name of the driver. We all had to crack up about how odd that was. What are the chances of that?

Mimi and Papa had arrived while I was stuck in the hospital so we all got to go out to dinner after I got home and got a very painful shower (trying washing your hair without the ability to tilt your head back to rinse it...). We had a good evening, but what followed was one of the worst nights of sleep in my life. I hurt sooooo bad. I was having sciatica pain as usual, but in addition, I couldn't lift my head off the pillow without physically grabbing it between my hands and lifting it with my arms. Poor Stu, I kept crying out in pain all night long as I tried to get comfortable. His neck ended up being stiff, but nothing like what I was feeling.

Now that it has been a week I am feeling much better. My neck is still sore, as is my back, but hopefully the ultrasound on Thursday will show reduced fluid and we can stop worrying so much about that aspect.

We had a great Easter with so much family here. This was Kaden's first Easter in America and I was really excited to celebrate it with him now that he is old enough to have fun participating in holidays (our last Easter was in Rome and the one before that was in Abu Dhabi). He was a champion at the egg hunts! In addition to Mimi and Papa, Mary-Leah and Jeff came down with their kids and we all had a great time chatting and hanging out and listening to them and their talents. What a bunch of musical kids! Harrison plays the trumpet and sings, Arlie plays the flute, Hayley plays the guitar really well, and she and Hannah kept us all entertained playing and singing around the firepit. Doug drove up too and brought Stu his smoker and we got to have a pork shoulder and 7 racks of ribs. They were soooo good. I could have eaten myself sick if it wasn't Mitch's birthday and there was cake too! :)

On Saturday we went to see Cats. Mo and Jeff and their kids and Stu were all underwhelmed. Jeff quipped, "We're dog people." Lol. I had seen the movie version so I knew what to expect so I enjoyed myself. Though I was still pretty uncomfortable from the wreck and I found myself getting irritable and exhausted about half-way through it. We also got to sit by Aaron, Jo and Maddie and Maddie sang every single word to every song. I was very impressed. :)

So we have had a busy week! And it is actually kind of nice for things to get back to normal now. School started back up this week so we are just back to the typical grindstone. Hope everyone is doing well and had a great Easter!

A New Article in Newsweek about VBACs.

2010-03-24T21:42:00.001+04:00

http://www.newsweek.com/id/235317

Just Trucking Along.

2010-03-18T23:06:00.004+04:00

This past weekend my Mommy was here visiting! Yay for Mommy time! She, as she always does when she comes, helped rearrange my house, cleaned, and reorganized my pantry AND fridge! :) It is so hard to get to those things that need done every so often when I barely have time after work and school to get to the things that need done EVERY DAY, so they always get pushed to the side. Enter Momma E! She bought containers for all my "bagged goods" (I buy most things in bulk so they live in my pantry in the bulk bag until we use them up) and even came up with several frugal ideas I would never have thought of to help things run more smoothly AND save money. Now that, I like!

We had a really great time having her here, Kaden especially. He "made" breakfast with her in the mornings, the first morning making pancakes where he mixed the batter all by himself and then he made eggs, toast, and "coffee" another morning! :) I so miss being home with him during the day. Yesterday I was sitting outside with him (freaking GORGEOUS days we have been having lately!) and he was having a real conversation with me. He is so grown up every day and I am missing it! I hate that. But the positive side is that he makes me laugh so hard at all the new things he says every single day. I always turn to Stu and repeat what he said in excitement/awe and I never stop getting tickled by his expressions.

School is going well. I am holding steady at the A-B range in all my classes (freaking Art History being the pain in the ass class dragging down my average, ugh) and the work is getting easier the more I use my brain on a regular basis. We just finished midterms and I feel pretty confident about how things are looking from here on out.

Work is going along fine too. I find myself busy a lot more often, which helps pass the time, and have been taking advantage of the slow time by doing homework at work so I don't miss anything when I am finally home with my boys.

Pregnancy is going fine too, fast. Except that I have been having quite unbearable sciatica pain. It is getting worse every single day and every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday when I walk across campus to my Art History class (the other two are much closer), I start having contractions and more often than not, one or both of my legs will stop working. There is nothing like being the fat pregnant lady on campus who randomly lets out of cry of pain and has to stop dead in her tracks until my legs decide to work again. Ugh. But I have another doctor's appointment tomorrow and hopefully relief will be in sight not too long after that. Tonight we have a prenatal tour at the hospital (I delivered Kaden there but was very unhappy with my experience and I have a LOT more questions this time around, especially with my goals of a Natural Childbirth VBAC... so hopefully I come out of that feeling more encouraged about the care there.) I'm just a few short weeks shy of my third trimester, so it is time to really get ready now. :)

Stu also has been having back pain these past few days. He thinks he slept on it wrong or something but yesterday was having terrible pain and kept wincing (familiarly, lol) throughout the evening. He's like, "I don't know how you deal with this every day." (Trust me, if I had a choice, I wouldn't. lol)

And that's about it for us. The weather has been so awesome and it has been great to sit outside in the sunshine on the super comfy outdoor furniture and enjoy each other. I also love that it has been getting dark so much later too so we have as much evening time as we want before we have to come in.

It's a BOY... and a BOY! :)

2010-02-25T20:36:00.003+04:00

No, no, I am not having twins, but my sister Justine found out she is also having a boy three days after I found out that we are! :) So that means our parents are going to have 3 grandsons and no granddaughters! This is particularly weird in our family because my brother and my cousin Harrison are the ONLY boys in our generation, so starting out the next generation with all boys is definitely new and exciting for the whole family. :)

Here is our little man! :)

The ultrasound went great and he appears to be healthy and growing right on schedule.

It's a bummer at the same time though because Justine and her new baby will be stuck in Germany until 2013. :( So her baby will be Kaden's age before they can move back to America and we (the family) can have a real relationship with him. That makes me sad since I never really missed much of Justine's life and I wish our little guys could grow up living close to each other and being friends, but that doesn't appear to be in the cards for us.

As far as our busy life goes, it's still going. It's been harder to leave in the mornings lately because Kaden is so vocal and expressive now. He tells me every morning, "Don't go to work Mommy, please!" And it takes everything I have not to cry and just give in to his simple demands and stay home with him. The other morning I said, "But Mommy has to go to work so we can have money to buy food to eat." And he said, "I'll buy money Mommy, it's ok." MELT. My sweet, sweet thoughtful boy. :(

The positive side of being so busy is that this pregnancy is FLYING by. By this time with Kaden I was already sick of being pregnant and just wanted a beer and to sleep without someone kicking me in the ribs. This time, partly due to an anterior-lying placenta, I rarely feel the baby and when I do, this baby more likes to roll around as opposed to violent punches and kicks like Kaden preferred (thought I still want that beer:)). And here I am at 22 weeks and I barely feel pregnant most of the time (except the nuisance my ever-growing belly presents when I want to do such things as tie my shoes).

Also, Stu has been so much more helpful and supportive this time around. It's so much nicer being older and "wiser" with this one because now he thinks to help me out without me asking for help, and does things to make my life easier. And on the flip side, I care so much less about the little, unimportant things, that I find myself so much more relaxed and happy this time around (while still be constantly overheated, sore, and tired :)). Because it isn't "new" to us, we're both able to just be excited about our new family member instead of being scared, apprehensive, etc. like we were with Kaden because it was ALL new and we had no idea what to expect.

So things have been going pretty good. We're both chugging along with school and it's going ok. My English class is without a doubt still my hardest (if anyone has read For Whom The Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway, or Light in August by William Faulkner, and wants to chat about it, lemme know. :)) but also my favorite by light years. I hate my Art History class with the fire of a thousand suns (or the professor, rather... who looks EXACTLY like Moby, as a helpful fellow student pointed out to me, and I can no longer take him seriously), and Math is typical dreadful Math, 'nuff said.

Stu is doing pretty well in his classes (and has a test in one today actually!). He studies hard all the time and is really working for the grades he has. I am so proud of him! If I had to guess, I'd say he probably likes his Psychology class the most and it wouldn't surprise me in the least if we had a change in major in the next few months. :)

It has been so nice outside here lately and I LOVE it. We got Kaden a swingset (thanks Granddad and Momma E!) for the backyard and he is the cutest thing out there on it. He and Jasper are the best of friends and they act just like siblings, playing sweetly one minute, hurting each other the next. Little crappers.

Nostalgia.

2010-02-18T02:03:00.002+04:00

It's amazing how much life changes so fast. Before we left Abu Dhabi, it was something we'd both been dreaming about for a LONG time. Now that we're back in America, the UAE seems a million miles away. And I don't mean that physically because obviously it is not very close to Idaho, but mentally. While we were there, America and getting home was all we could think about it, and it feels weird that we don't think about Abu Dhabi more since we've been back. It was our home for a long time after all.

But now we've been away long enough that the bad things don't seem so bad and the things we miss start to nag. We talk about going back all the time, for the money, the simpler life, the shawarmas :). I think we both finally appreciate what we had there, when we can look at it from a distance. Living in America again is every bit as good as I'd hoped, but we fit there too. I was looking back at pictures of how much we did and accomplished while we were there and how much of Kaden's development happened there, and I know Abu Dhabi will always hold a special place in our hearts and memories as we move forward with "real" life now.

Speaking of real life now, I am freaking exhausted! Haha. Maybe that is why remembering the days when ALL I had to accomplish was keeping my son alive, and having dinner ready for my husband, seem so fancy. In all honesty, it is absolutely harder to be away from Kaden all day than I thought it would be. I always miss him and regret that I am not there to share his day with him. Not to mention with the pressures of school and that little part about growing another human, and my days are pretty tiring. But soon this semester will be over, a new baby will be here, and we will fall into yet another new routine with our new addition and I'll probably miss these days. :)

Speaking of the new baby, I had my 20 week check-up yesterday (half-way done! :)) and everything looks great. I am right on track (if not a little behind) with my weight gain, MY vitals are perfect, and baby's heartbeat is 151 and super strong. We go in this Saturday (only three days! woot woot!) to find out what we are having and do the anatomy scan to make sure everything is growing as it should be. While I still FEEL like I am having another boy, I can't help but hope for pink! :) Plus Kaden is adamant that he wants a sister and not a brother, so who am I to dash our hopes until we know for SURE? :)

School, et al.

2010-02-02T01:31:00.002+04:00

So, I opened up a window for Blogger early this morning when I got to work. Then I realized how behind I was in reading my many favorite blogs and the reason and desire to blog were suddenly lost.

Now, I am back from class and I am feeling only slightly more interested in it, but I feel like the world's worst blogger and I can't help but feeling like I have become exactly like every other blog I used to read, whose owner went back to America and dropped off the face of the blog-world.

Determined to not be so cavalier with my blog (heh :)), I am here to recap what's been going on.

We still have Jasper, though after a few days of him being a particular pain in the ass, I found myself silently wondering if it would be SO horrid to cash in on their "30-day policy". Doubts aside, he really is a great dog and Kaden just loves him. They play together so much longer than Kaden used to play by himself. And although they do find double the trouble to get into, they are two of a kind and have become the best of friends. I'm glad we got him (and have kept him! haha)

School is going fine. There are some days when I get home (night class days in particular) where I fall into the nearest comfy chair and feel sorry for myself for having left before the sun came up, and gotten home after it went down. It can't last long though, because I have a husband and toddler to cuddle, and typically a crap-ton of stuff to get done to prepare for the next day to do it all over again. I do try to remember, in my darkest moments, that there are so many people out there less fortunate than me, and while I envy my husband's ability to stay home with Kaden and only have to focus on school, it could really be so much worse (I could live in Haiti...). I have a good breakdown about once every two weeks or so for now though.

Work is fine as well. Again, working full time and going to school and growing another person, is really all hard work by themselves, together they are downright debilitating some days, but I just keep telling myself, "tomorrow will be better" and it usually is. We've been taking full advantage of the time we DO have as a family and it has made those moments even sweeter.

For example, last night we got to christen our new fire pit we got this weekend. It was great. We made frozen pizza for dinner and had a "picnic" (which Kaden ALWAYS thinks is the coolest way to eat a meal... and let's be honest, isn't it???) outside by the fire. Then we made s'mores of course! I did take some pictures but didn't have a chance to upload them yet, so I will post them later.

Yesterday was also Joslyn's baby shower. For those who aren't on Facebook, or don't keep up, Joslyn and Aaron have had a hard time having a baby. After several miscarriages, this one is a keeper after Jo underwent a cerclage, but he is likely going to have some trouble with an arm and possibly a leg. The neonatal surgeon won't know the extent of the surgeries the baby may have to undergo until after he is born. For now, Jo has a scheduled c-section on February 22nd. We're hoping everything goes well and he is not as bad off as he could be. But the party went well, I think everyone had a good time, and it's always nice to see people you rarely get a chance to see.

That's about it from me for now. Back to the grindstone! :)

Jasper.

2010-01-19T21:01:00.004+04:00

This weekend was great. My Mommy came into town from Coeur d'Alene and it is ALWAYS so nice to have her around. It made both Stu and I want to move to CdA to be closer to them. Kaden was absolutely in LOVE with his "Momma E". He followed her around and wanted her approval for everything he did. It was so great.

We ended the weekend by getting a puppy! :) He is a 14-week-old black lab mix from the Humane Society and he is so sweet. I had been adamant that we couldn't get a dog yet. We were both starting school, another baby on the way, we just didn't have enough time or love for a puppy right now. But then he did the unthinkable and showed me a picture of a sweet little 14-week old puppy with a blue bandanna around his neck. I melted. I caved.

We jumped in the car with my Mom and my cousin Flower (who had also fallen in love with him by just his picture) and headed down to the Humane Society. It took us less than ten minutes to locate him and then before I knew it, we were signing adoption papers and picking out a collar and leash.

We named his Jasper and brought him home and then Stu and I set off in search of a doggy bed and supplies for him. He got to go play with my Uncle Doug's dogs (Woodie and Ozzy) and then we all went home. He has been so great so far with potty training and getting used to his new place in our family and we have been happy to have him. Kaden and Jasper play for much longer than Kaden used to play by himself and last night he didn't go potty in his "kennel" (our mud room) at all! So that's great!

Stu and I both grew up with black labs so it is a nice tradition to pass down to our son. :)

Jasper playing with the other dogs at Marcia's house.

Taking a little snooze.

We start school today and as I type this, Stu is sitting in his Sociology class (hopefully taking lots of notes! :)) I have math after work tonight in a double session (on Tuesdays) so I won't be home until after 7, which sucks, but hopefully the next 4 months will fly by and then we will be that much closer to our degrees when the new addition to our family makes his or her arrival this summer.

Christmas 2009 Update.

2010-01-06T00:00:00.003+04:00

I have just been a bad blogger since I got home. What a shame. I keep forgetting I even have one. How's THAT for being otherwise prioritized? Haha. I used to LIVE on this blog.

Anyway, so we've been pretty busy the past few weeks getting our house organized more and unpacking the mounds of boxes I didn't even know we had (and tossing a great majority of it).

Christmas was fun. My little Kaden boy delighted in opening his cool gifts and partaking in the magic of Santa. His favorite part that was Santa actually ate the cookies and milk we left out for him! He was amazed. :)

We also went sledding with friends up in Idaho City and made time for Christmas lights and of course some Christmas movies.

The rest of the week I had off, Stu and I got into the routine of organizing/unpacking in the morning then after lunch Kaden would go down for nap and we would cuddle up on the couch (and recline of course! hehe) and watch Man v. Food, Anthony Bourdain, and the Discovery Channel to pass the nap time.

Now I am back at work and we are trying to get our house ready for both my Mommy's upcoming visit (no fog this time!!! I mean it!) and starting school in less than two weeks. My evenings get drastically shorter once school starts (as does my lunch, heh) so I want to have as much done and ready to go as possible.

We found out how unorganized we still are when this weekend Kaden came down with a pretty gnarly fever and we couldn't find any of the 3 or 4 thermometers were had. So I had to make a run to the store for a new (super cool 8-second) thermometer and Children's Tylenol to soothe my poor sick baby. Luckily, thanks to his super immune system, after two doses of Tylenol and a good deal of lounging in from of the TV all day, he was back to his happy, mischievous self the next morning. Thank God.

Stu is adjusting well to being back home. Though he did have his first twinges of reverse homesickness last night, saying, "I miss it there sometimes." I had talked to him about this phenomenon while he was still over there, to which he replied, "No way, I hate this f**king place. I won't miss anything about it." Told ya! :) But otherwise he is starting to get bored of being home all the time with Kaden and seems eager/anxious to start school.

I have been pretty good. I feel pretty "normal", though I definitely have a belly now that wasn't there before. I'm not feeling nearly as sick as often and only certain smells trigger it for me now. Which is way better than everything making me ill. Everyone keeps asking, but I still don't have a good due-date yet. I'll let you know when I know. :)

Mr. Mom

2009-12-22T19:11:00.002+04:00

My husband is so great. So last night on my way home I got a text asking me if I wanted onions on my salad. Wow. Making a salad! I said, "Green."

I got home and the house smelled of apples and cinnamon. Stuart was in the kitchen slicing vegetables for our salad to go with the mashed potatoes and apple baked pork chops he'd prepared. What a great guy!

I rushed upstairs to shower while dinner finished and then got to greet my boys with dinner on the table. It was kind of funny too because earlier in the day Stu sent me a text saying how well-behaved our son is and how great it is to hang out with him. But by 3:30, he's a terror and is just ready for something "new" (something I've said to Stu a hundred times, but now he understands, hehe).

Then he said the sweetest words ever: "I never gave you enough credit for doing this." Ahhhh... there is nothing better in the world than having someone understand you. :) He couldn't believe how exhausted he was from taking care of a toddler all day. (Told ya! :)) What a great opportunity for our family. Not only have we both had the opportunity to be the breadwinner, but now we have both had the opportunity to be the stay-at-home-parent. And Stu can appreciate how hard it really was for me staying home all the time in Abu Dhabi (I said, "Imagine doing all of this with no vehicle, no yard, and not leaving the house but once a week..."). And now that I'm working again, I know all too well the feeling of "missing it" being gone all day and then feeling too tired to really play when I get home. I am so proud of Stu for taking the initiative to take care of Kaden and the house AND dinner because I am gone all day.

On a side note, he also went to RC Willey yesterday and bought a 52-inch Sony Bravia LCD TV, a surround system to go with it, and a new dining room set (to be delivered and set up on Wednesday! Yay!). Today he has his sights set on a stand for the TV "stuff" (you know, DVD player, Wii, Xbox, etc.). I am hoping he picks one that is reasonably cheap. Heh. We HAVE stayed far under budget for everything we'd planned (the cars, living room set, bedroom set, etc) thanks in large part to my super skills (i.e. standing in line at RC Willey for 2 hours on Black Friday), so that makes me feel much better.

The caffeine Nazis will be happy to hear that this morning I made MYSELF a decaf Hazelnut latte instead of giving in and heading to McDonald's for a caffeinated one made by someone else. :) Soon I will have steamed milk, not microwaved, and real espresso, not just super-strongly-brewed decaf coffee. But it is still yummy! :)

Daddy's First Weekend Home.

2009-12-21T22:40:00.000+04:00

Our first weekend with Daddy home went great! We stayed super busy and it was full of running around AND relaxing and, mostly, just spending as much time together as possible.

Stu is so happy to be home, just like I knew he would be. He got his truck all ready to go (changed fluids, rotated tires, etc), got a phone, and today called me to clear spending almost 3 grand at RC Willey! Lol. He sure is taking this living life to the fullest thing pretty seriously. But, on Wednesday we will have a 52 inch TV in our living room, a surround sound to go with it, a new dining room set…. All so that we can watch local programming because Stu doesn’t want to spend the money on DirecTV, lol. Silly boy. I think he’ll be changing his mind after a few more days of him and Kaden having nothing else to do but watch movies. Hehe.

Friday night we had some friends over for snacks and to welcome our boy home. It is always nice seeing everyone and maybe next time we’ll actually pull out the games we’d planned on playing. Haha.

We got to go on a date to the movies this weekend! It was our first alone date in over a year and it was nice. We also got up early on Saturday morning and headed off for Cracker Barrel for a super yummy breakfast (with sweet tea for Stu). It was fantastic.

We got most of our Christmas shopping done and Stu has been pretty motivated to get the house done and organized so he keeps putting himself to work on that. Which, of course, is fine by me, because I hit my threshold for organizing last week.

We made a homemade pizza last night and then decorated the tree and went for a drive to look at Christmas lights (if you’re in Boise and haven’t gone up to Quail Ridge yet to see the crazy guy with the lights, do so, it was indeed crazy). We brought thermoses of hot chocolate and a snack-sized bag of marshmallows for Kaden, which he thought were the best things EVER! He kept falling asleep on the drive so we headed home after a bit and Kaden played with his cool new Cars bike he got from Kyle and Melissa for the millionth time already before we all headed off for bed.

It is so, SO hard to get up and go to work when there are two sleepy-eyed, jammies-ed, cuddled up, warm boys just sitting there. I was kinda late, but they’re lucky I got here at all. :) Oh, and fat-free vanilla yogurt with French Vanilla granola was just as heavenly as I’d imagined it would be. Thank you, Winco, for your practically free food.

Homecoming: How Sweet it is.

2009-12-18T19:25:00.000+04:00

He’s home! He’s home! And I actually still can’t believe it. After everything that we went through yesterday, I didn’t think we’d ever get to see him walk through those glass doors at Boise Airport!

So, as some know, my Mom was also supposed to fly in yesterday in the early evening. She called me a half hour before her plane was supposed to board to tell me that because of dense fog in Boise, her flight was cancelled (for a few seconds I thought she was joking as Stu pulled the SAME joke on me before he got on HIS flight!). I walked out of my office to the huge picture windows in the breezeway and sure enough, I couldn’t see a few dozen yards. Crap.

So, after getting ultra-bummed, I had to accept that she really wasn’t coming and move on with my plans without her (she’d played quite heavily into my weekend plans and now they have to be changed. Poo.)

So I left work bummed about my Mom, but also worried because Stu said he would call me when he landed in Chicago. Being that it was nearing the time he would have been boarding his flight to Boise (after a 5 hour layover), I was nervous/irritated and trying to figure out what logical reason he would have had for NOT calling me when he said he would (topping my list were: he was detained by customs for possession of pirated material, he had a stroke in Abu Dhabi and never actually boarded that plane and was dying in an Abu Dhabi hospital, or that he fell asleep waiting for his connection and was about it miss it and sleep in Chicago overnight ß I’m pregnant, what do you want from me?).

So after going grocery shopping I finally made it to Marcia’s where I had to break the news about Momma E to my son, who then decided he didn’t want to talk to her on the phone if she wasn’t coming to see him (spiteful much? Lol). I rounded up the phone numbers to United Airlines, Chicago O’Hare and Boise Airport and started making calls. Southwest had told my Mom that all flights coming into Boise were being diverted and that they would probably not tell me that until minutes before their expected arrival time (WHAT??). So I called United and they assured me that Stu DID, in fact, check in (so he wasn’t dying in Abu Dhabi at least) for his Chicago to Boise flight. That made me feel SLIGHTLY better and then irritation won over (“Then why the Hell hasn’t he called me?”)

After two hours of stressing about the fog and watching every flight before his get cancelled or diverted (as Southwest prophesized), Kristin finally called Boise Airport for the last time and asked if it would land or be diverted. He assured her that “it will land in 30 minutes”. Woohoo! So we let Jo and Aaron know and then headed off to the airport.

Upon arrival, our meager little welcome home party seemed just that when we realized a bunch of guys that were coming straight out of basic training were arriving too, and all their families had come out in full force with signs and balloons and great grandmas, despite the after-11 hour. One girl was obviously being surprised. She had a scarf tied around her head, an ipod in her ears, and ear muffs over those. We were almost as excited to see her reunion with whoever was meeting her there as we were for our own (almost, heh).

Kaden was none-too-excited about the hour and would only look any one of us in the eye if we reminded him that Daddy was coming home. He would perk up a bit and tell us that Daddy would be coming through “those doors”. Sure enough, a few passengers start trickling through and then Kristin and Jo assure me that they could see Stu (I’m blind, as some know), in the outfit I described he’d be wearing. Eventually I saw his pretty face too and couldn’t contain myself. I had to rush up and tackle him. :) I said, “I’m so glad you’re home!... Why the hell didn’t you call me?” He seemed shocked by the fact that because he said he’d call me, I’d expect him to and he assured me, “Well I would have if something went wrong.” Greaaaaat.

We got to see the reunion with the blindfolded girl and her boyfriend. Very cute, and then we proceeded to the baggage claim. Kaden latched onto his Daddy and kepy pointing his little finger into his chest and telling everyone, “It’s Daddy.”

I’ll tell you what, homecoming is great. I was nervous and slightly apprehensive about it. I mean, he HAS been gone for a long time and would he still like me?, heh. But as soon as I saw him and smelled him, that all washed away and it, of course, felt absolutely right. AND, I forgot how good looking my husband is! My memory-face of him is just that: his face. I didn’t think about his whole body and the way he walks and moves and smells. That sounds weird, but he has such a distinct, yummy smell that I definitely missed it. I couldn’t stop looking at him while we got his bags and (unsafely) in the car on the way home. I love this man.

When we got home I felt elated. Our home has just not been home yet without Daddy. Our family isn’t our family without him and him coming in and getting the grand tour just made it feel so much more like “ours”. I was so giddy and smiley that I never thought I’d be able to sleep. Kaden kept smirking and saying “Hi Daddy!” and didn’t want him to put him down for any reason.

This morning when Kaden woke up, he called for me as he always does to go get him from his room. Then as soon as I opened the door he said, “Where’s Daddy?” and the two of them got to cuddle and read books while Mommy got ready for work. I haven’t seen my baby boy so happy in a long time. He kept smiling and hugging his Daddy and petting him. Sweet boy.

And I’m at stupid work while my boys are home playing and unpacking. Stu is going to be exhausted later, but I offered to take Kaden to Marcia’s so he could sleep, but I couldn’t have resisted that bright happy face either if I were him. :)

I only have to work a half-day today because I worked an extra hour a day the whole first part of this week in anticipation of this day, so I get to go home in a few hours and see my boys for the whole weekend! I am so excited to get to know Stu again and share everything we’ve been through and done in the past two months, including all the new words that Kaden has learned!

I hope everyone has a great weekend! I certainly will.

Has being a parent made you a better person?

2009-12-17T02:58:00.000+04:00

As today was my 5th morning in a row waking up before my alarm (or, in the case of the weekend, waking up at all) to comfort a crying and frightened child, I began to think about all the ways being a parent has changed me.

As all parents are undoubtedly aware, there is a distinction in my life of “before Kaden” and “after Kaden”. And it occurred to me that I really like my “after Kaden” self much, much better. Being a parent has made me a better person and I finally figured out why: for the first time in my life, I love another person more than my own life. That sounds decidedly trite, but it’s the defining factor in what changed me so much.

After putting my wants (quiet hot baths, alone with a book until the water got cold) and needs (sleep) aside to get up every single day for a solid year to feed a helpless, crying baby in the middle of the night, my perspective on life really changed. I know every parent has to do this, but I find my life now surrounded by people who are not parents (grouchy, unkempt 18-year-old college kids, heh) and I feel wise (read: old).

This morning Kaden cried out for me as he has every other morning this week, and my feet were on the floor before I’d even realized I was awake. I didn’t bother feeling sorry for myself and that hour of missed sleep, instead I greeted my sleepy boy and asked him how his sleep went. All HE wanted to do was cuddle with me in “Mommy’s bed” and read his books (I had to get ready for work). So today I am sporting a messy bun and the bare essentials of my make-up routine so that I could read “Miss Honey’s Busy Day” one more time before work.

I find myself being much better at my job and I think it’s because after having to multitask to get anything done for the past two and a half years, as long as my coworkers are not hanging on my leg and whining at me, it feels like their requests are laughably easy to handle. I’m more focused when I’m working on a project and I get it done in record time… because let’s face it, my “real” life has precious little time available and everything still needs to get done.

And the biggest change has been that I am easier on people now. After comforting a toddler who’s had a stressful experience, I realized that most people could really just use a little more compassion, especially other parents. You’ll never see ME rolling my eyes on an airplane because a Mom can’t get her toddler to sit still or stop crying.

Maybe if everyone, even nonparents, had to comfort a child with the flu while THEY had the flu, the world would be full of compassion (and better people). :)

Trash v. Treasure

2009-12-15T21:00:00.003+04:00

It's much more official today: Stu is coming home. The reason it is more official today is that he had the TV and Internet turned off and is coming home after work tomorrow to pack and clean and be ready to go! Scaaaary. I remember that feeling a couple months ago as I was packing that felt like I was forgetting EVERYTHING, but at least I could just have him send me the stuff I forgot or didn't have room for. If he doesn't send it ahead, or pack it in his luggage, it's staying there.

So right now, he has invited Qadir, our watchman, up to the apartment to go through some of the things that he can't or doesn't want to take (our folding beach chairs, a wicker shelf in the bathroom, kitchen utensils, food, shoes, etc). I think it's the perfect way to get rid of some of those things because otherwise, in a week or so, the company will send someone in to throw away everything that isn't "theirs" and what a waste. I've complained a lot about Abu Dhabi's lack of good, accessible charity services and it seems like such a waste to throw away perfect good usable things, so I am so glad Stu thought of Qadir.

I've talked to Qadir on many occasions about his home life and his life in Abu Dhabi and I know he will be grateful for anything we could give him, even if it isn't important to us anymore. His little accomodations consist of a cot, a hot plate to cook his food on, a small bathroom, and whatever he has come across as he has been here. He has maybe 5 different outfits total. And he always had various people staying with him in his already limited space. When fellow Pakistani's were on hard times, he always welcomed them.

He has a son back home in Pakistan who is exactly Kaden's age (and a daughter who is two years older) and he because of his age, really latched onto Kaden when we first moved there and Kaden was barely 7 months old and had just learned to crawl. As I watched my own son grow before my eyes over the next year and a half, I also watched the heartbreak in Qadir's eyes every time he would tell me, "now my son is this big too". I can't imagine missing my kids' lives so that I can provide a meager life for my family.

We also got pretty attached to Qadir's brother while Qadir was on his one vacation (every two years) to Pakistan. He was so respectful to me and always came to stand watch when there were workers in my house, "for security" for said (he didn't trust them alone with me). He spoke almost no English and I speak no Urdu, but we developed a good bond during his couple months there. He has since gotten a job as a delivery truck driver in town. I hope they can find the means to get back home and live alongside their own families and not have to resort to living and working in a foreign country in a 6 x 10 closet, just trying to keep their families fed.

Let's remember that even in America there are so many people who are in need this holiday season and take the time to do your part for your community.

For those in the Boise area, you can contact the following places to find out how you can help:

US Marine Corps Toys for Tots
Boise Rescue Mission
Channel 7's Season Of Hope
December Food Drive at the Morrison Center
Kissin 92's Keep Kids Warm Campaign
WOW Country 104.3's Hope for the Holidays

Home Sweet Home.

2009-12-14T21:08:00.002+04:00

Kaden and I have officially survived our first two nights alone in our new house. The first night was more freaky than the second. I didn't sleep well and kept waking up a bit disoriented. But last night I had to get out of bed to check the front door lock again and then I slept pretty well until Kaden started crying at 5:15 and wouldn't go back to sleep. Ugh. I think he must have had a nightmare or something because normally his night-time (and yes, 5 AM is STILL night time) wakings just take me going in there and reminding him it is still dark and night time and he goes back to sleep. Not so this morning.

But speaking of Kaden, He has been doing so great with his words and communication. He used full sentences all the time now and he comes up with new words every single day. Here are a couple of my favorites from the past few weeks:

He thinks the word "scary" is pronounced "seggy" and it took Marcia and I a week to figure out what "Seggy" meant before we realized he was telling us when things were freaking him out. Which is adorable, btw. My little man rushing to me and saying "it's seggy!" Cuuuute.

The other word, which is starting to fade, is his word for Christmas, which is "crimson". So he helped me set up the "crimson tree" and I couldn't help but laugh. But last night we were reading about Frosty and he said "criss-us" which is a lot closer to the real world, and certainly not as cute. :)

This morning was great though. Because it was my first day of getting ready for work in the new house, it was even better than I'd guessed. Marcia decided she'd come to me instead of me bringing Kaden to her, so I didn't even have to get Kaden dressed and fed and out the door. I got ready, made myself some tea for my Starbucks to-go mug (which was like "new" after two years in storage, hehe), I didn't have to warm up my car or scrape my windows, and I was 2 stoplights closer to work than normal so I slid out into traffic and was already half-way there. :) Lovely.

I was also the first one here by about 2 hours, which is kind of nice. I'm not really a morning person and it takes me a bit to get going, so having that time to myself was definitely nice. A good start to a Monday. :)

Guess what??? 3 days!!! Squeeeeeee. I can't believe I get to NOT be a single Mom again in just 3 days! When I won't have to handle everything myself. I am constantly thinking of things that are just so much easier with my husband around. Like bath time. I have to shower WITH my kid (playing with his toys on the far side of the shower) because he will get into everything or possibly even escape if I tried to shower and leave him unattended. And bathing him is a chore too without a bit of help. I was sitting on the couch, all cuddled up with Kaden watching The Incredibles last night and the light over the table was still on from dinner and shining right in my eyes and I thought how nice it would be to say, "Babe, will you turn off that light on your way by?" Instead, anything I want done, or that NEEDS done (the kid has needs, regardless of how crappy or exhausted I feel), I have to do myself. Last night I HAD to make dinner even though I would have been fine snacking myself full, because Kaden needed to eat more than a handful of M&Ms and Triscuits, like I would have done if I was alone. It definitely makes me appreciate having Stu in my life. Even when he drives me crazy. :)

I tried to get as much done this weekend so that when my Mom gets here on Thursday (and Stu gets here Thursday night) they can feel somewhat at "home". But it snowed again this weekend and when Kaden and I did venture out, I slid half-way through an intersection. Freaking snow. But I got as much as had occurred to me to that point, only to realize yet again that I missed a bunch of things. It's soooo hard re-outfitting an entire house again. (Like, of course I remembered a shower curtain for the kids' bathroom, but did I remember HOOKS for the shower curtain??? No. So there it sits on the counter awaiting another store trip for hooks (and the other 15 things I realized I forgot). But I have to work late every day this week so I can take a half-day on Friday and spend some time with my family, so I will be home late, dinner will be later, and there is just not enough time left of the day to also go shopping. So we will see how much I get done between now and then. I also still need to finish unpacking things like my (walk-in) closet, which is a 3-foot-high solid mound of clothes and comforters and jackets, etc. I have been sorting them slowly but surely, but there is always something else that needs done more.

Anyway, so here I am at work, fairly bored, worrying about all the things that are NOT getting done. Heh. Perhaps I should work instead. :)

Moving In.

2009-12-12T02:43:00.002+04:00

Starting this weekend, Kaden and I will officially get to live in our "new house". Yay! The washer and dryer arrived today and I hope to get a shopping trip done tonight before the snow storm comes into town (or I might find a reason to procrastinate that, heh).

It is now only 6 days until Daddy and Momma E come (home) to visit! Kaden doesn't really understand what is going on, but I'm hoping he can get settled into his new room and environment before we screw it all up again with Daddy and Momma E around. Haha.

So I have been making a grocery list (and slowly, a menu plan for next week, ugh) and HOLY CRAP is there a lot to buy when you have NOTHING in your house/pantry. Poor Stu is going to have a coronary when he sees THAT bill. Heh.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Field Trip... er, Meeting.

2009-12-10T00:08:00.002+04:00

This morning was interesting. I got to attend a meeting at the State Department of Education (and meet all those lovely people), but I found out that the Dept. of Ed. lives in the same building that I used to work in at the AG's Office! Talk about nostalgia as I walked in those doors for the first time in two years. The AG's Office has since moved, so I couldn't stop in and say hi, but it was so scary to be right back there once again. It felt sort of symbolic, my life has come full-circle (but a much prettier, better funded, nicer circle) since I last walked out of those doors. It felt good.

Then I got to come back to campus at 10:30, which if you ever get the chance to do, don't. There was NO parking so I had to park in the over-priced garage again. But it is good to know, in case I ever need to leave at weird times during the day. I need to really get a schedule of classes so I can plan my arrival to the times some classes let out so SOMEONE must be leaving their spot and I can grab it up.

Work is going pretty slow today. I didn't get an email with attachments that I need to start my next big project and I finished the last one a bit quicker than I planned so I am kind of out of stuff to do in the interim.

8 days until Stu gets home! Yay! And then him, Kaden, my Mom, and I can decorate the tree and go see Christmas lights! :)

Christmas Spirit?

2009-12-07T22:45:00.002+04:00

So, for those of you not obsessively counting, it is just 11 days until Stu gets home for good! I can't WAIT to have him back and have our lives go back to a more busy version of our "normal". I miss everything we used to do together including just watching movies or talking over dinner about our days (and now that mine are infinitely more busy, I miss the conversation even more).

You would not believe how depressing it is to get out Christmas stuff all alone in a cold and empty house. Pathetic, huh? Marcia and Deven went grocery shopping yesterday and stopped by the house (which I'm still not living in, bastard delivery guys) to pick up Kaden while I was hauling out Christmas stuff. I set up the tree with Kaden and he thought it was awesome but once he was gone I started unwrapping ornaments and decor and I just couldn't bring myself to decorate the tree or hang lights by myself. So I decided we'll wait for Daddy to get home and then we'll all decorate the tree together. My Mom gets here the day before Stu, too, so I can decorate a tree with my Mommy for the first time in like 6 or 7 years too!

Work is going better now. I finally understand my job and I have been given some fairly complex and time-consuming projects for the next month so it is nice to feel like I'm actually there to do something and not just to kill time. The weekend went nice and slow too, which was nice after feeling like I'd just lived through the longest week of my life. Kaden likes me again on the weekends, which is nice because he's been mad at me after I get home from work and I think it's because he feels abandoned. Today at least I got a chance to love on him some and say goodbye before I left, so that might help.

Anyway, I am just truckin' along now. Hoping the next 11 days go by super fast and then I can play with my Mommy and hubby and feel more Christmasy. :)

New Job.

2009-12-02T01:27:00.002+04:00

I know. I KNOW. I have been a huge blog slacker lately and I sure have heard about it. Lol. The problem is, at Marcia's, the "kids" computer is upstairs and Kaden is generally getting into one thing or another either up there with me, or downstairs without me (infinitely worse) that I really don't have much time to get on and spend any time on there.

So now I have a job again. :) Which means I do have some down time and you can probably expect more blogs again. Hehe. It's gone well so far. This is only my second day and I am just stumbling through all the new processes and freaking acronyms I need to know to actually do my job. I was given a list with "common acronyms" that was two columns and 8 pages long! Are you freaking kidding me? Is there any really good reason we can't just call it "No Child Left Behind" instead of "NCLB"?? A good reason? No? Ok, just checking. I'm calling it "No Child Left Behind". :)

I love love love my boss so far and the other woman I will be working closely with. I am the sole support for my boss who supports the whole state, so she is gone ALL the time (this week is only IN the office about 6 total hours), but my not-boss brought me hot chocolate today! What a doll! At first I was thinking that working in the same office as my painfully quiet office pal was going to wear on me, but she is friendly enough and the quiet is actually a nice change from the constant noise that I'm used to with a two-year-old. I have done more reading (work-related) in the past two days than I have for pleasure in the past month and all without someone asking me for a sippy cup of milk or to change their diaper. I'm telling you, being a working mom has its benefits. :)

But it has been hard to be away from my Kaden. I've almost cried when I had to leave both mornings now and when I get home there is just not enough time left of the day to really spend quality time with him. Meals have to be made, showers taken, etc. I felt very rushed last night and I really just wanted to sleep. So we will see how it goes.

I can't WAIT for Stu to get home! Just two weeks and two days until he gets back finally and it couldn't come any sooner! I miss him so much and I miss our little uncomplicated simple life. I know it will be a bit more complicated and busy with working and going to school in addition to normal life, but I can't wait to have my best friend back.

Ok, more to do so I will go for now. I'll really try to be more diligent about blogging. :)

Black Friday.

2009-11-28T00:03:00.004+04:00

So this was my first real experience with Black Friday (other than picking up a few needed items once or twice) and I did it alone with a two-year-old! Heh.

First let me start off by saying what an angel baby Kaden was. (Mommy and all of our line neighbors thank you for being such a good boy!) We headed off to RC Willey to get a reclining couch and recliner living room set (doorbuster, only 9 available... I got the last one). We rushed off without breakfast and I grabbed two Nutri-grain bars and a sippy cup of milk on the way out the door. The store was so cramped (they opened at 8 and I got there at 8:07) that cars were parallel parked out almost to the street and J105 radio station was there and even Larry Gebert from Channel 7! (I got a terribly blurry pic that I'll post momentarily).

Where's Larry? :)

So instead of following everyone else's lead and rushing the store like a madwoman, I approached the nearest stock boy and asked if they still had any of the doorbuster microfiber reclining sofa sets left. He said, "Let's go check. We have to hurry." and he proceeded to RUN to the living room section (Run.) while I bounced along after him with my too-heavy parka-clad kid on my hip. We got there and he pushed an idling man out of the way to grab the last ticket and announced, "We got it!" Me: "Yay. Er... thanks." After he gets me all set up (yes, we want it treated and delivered), he points me to the checkout line. Holy. Shit.

The checkout "line" went all the way around the entire outer perimeter of the store and almost doubled back on its self at the front. This may not be news to those who often brave Black Friday sales, but this was a first for me. Feeling Kaden's weight on my hip and staring at the unmoving line, I first pondered crying, then just leaving. But it was a REALLY good deal. So I waited. And waited. And waited. And about half-way through the waiting process, the lady standing behind me said, "Ok, you just have to go get a stroller from the front of the store. Your arms are starting to hurt ME. I'll hold your spot in line." We laughed and I agreed. With shaking arms, I towed Kaden and my starving, pregnant, fatigued self over to the strollers and loaded him up.

I stole a balloon for my kid. It turned out to be a great idea.

Here's the coolest part. The strollers are shaped like little cars, so Kaden spent a good 20 minutes examining the wheels, headlights, steering wheel and seat before he was ready for the next activity. I kept ahead of him by thinking of fun things to look at, talk about, and play with (thank God for that little pad of paper and pencil I keep in my purse and the lady with the candy who came around twice). Sparing you the boring details, we sat in line for over an hour and a half before we made it to the checkout. The guy there took care of it in minutes and then brightened my day by asking, "And did you want the DVD player and the movie Up for 10 dollars more?" Me, stunned: "Is that an option?" "Yeah, if you spend over $499 you get this DVD player and the new Pixar movie "Up" for 10 bucks." Me: "Right on! Of course I want them." It should be noted that I JUST looked at the movie two days ago but it retails for $21.99 and because I hadn't actually seen it yet, I didn't want to risk it being crappy for 22 bucks.

Kaden, "I want to go home."

We decided after that line we'd better head home, but Walmart had a few more deals I wanted to look at. I got there and basically everything was gone that I wanted of the doorbuster deals, so we decided to call it a day and went home for a snack. I was only a few bites into my snack, though, when I discovered Home Depot's washer and dryer sales. By golly we need those! So I packed Kaden back up and we spent another hour looking at washers and dryers and finally picking one out for several hundred bucks less than I intended to spend. Good news. :)

Kaden, bless his heart, fell asleep as soon as he got back in the car and stayed asleep after we got home so I took him upstairs and tucked him in. Now I plan to have a bit more apple cider and read the paper while my monkey finishes his nap.

How did everyone else do today?

My Great Day.

2009-11-21T04:57:00.005+04:00

If there was ever a day to blog, it is this day. First of all, my day started off totally stressful. Kaden and Cocoa (the dog that lives here) do NOT get alone by any stretch of the imagination. So my morning was spent trying to keep them both quiet, and away from each other (Kaden pisses Cocoa off and then Cocoa bites Kaden... little fucker). As soon as possible I took Kaden off to the park. The bummer started when I got a call in the early morning from BSU offering me THE job I had wanted all along. Unfortunately I'd already accepted another offer from the prison (but let's face it, who really wants to work at a prison?) so I told her as much before hanging up and feeling let down.

I talked to Stu while we were at the park and that helped some, but I'd already decided not to go to school this coming semester because working until 5 every day and then going to school until 9 every day, all while being pregnant and trying to fit in family time didn't seem like it was going to work out very well.

But then, low and behold I get another call from the BSU lady begging me to take the job and pointing out all the ways and reasons I can still refuse the other job (the major points being that I haven't actually started there yet, so I don't really have any loyalty to them, and that, uh, it's a prison...). So I called the prison back and gently let them know that I would not be taking the job.

But here's the best part. The job with BSU has the added benefit of deferred tuition which means that I will get to take classes for 5 bucks a credit (or 15 bucks a class... instead of the several hundred I have been paying thus far), plus I will work on campus where as a perk I can take class when I need to (if I need to take class from 11-1 every day, I can) so that I can actually finish my degree in the nearer future instead of some distant time that I can't even glimpse yet.

As if this wasn't more settling news all by its self, I also got a call back from a lady we applied for a rental house with, that I expected to be turned down for because we offered to pay $75 less per month than they were asking (which was a completely fair price for the size of the house, we just couldn't afford it). Instead she said the owner accepted the offer and that "it's all yours!" I will post pics of the house and backyard (which was the selling point for me). But it is a 4 bedroom, 2.5 bath house with a "bonus room" that is the size of the master bedroom, walk-in closet, and master bathroom combined. It's freaking huge. I am so excited we got it because we were about to settle for a TINY 3 bedroom 2 bath on a teensy piece of land for 25 bucks less than what we're going to be paying for this monstrosity. I can't wait!

To top off my super day, I am going on a date with Melissa to see New Moon (FINALLY)! What a day, eh? :)

My New Prius!

2009-11-13T08:15:00.003+04:00

So, I don't know what's with my blogging funk. It's not necessarily that I don't have the time to blog anymore (it may be truer than before, but surely I could find ample time). I just have kind of been feeling less than stellar. Maybe it's that I still feel totally out of my element and that's a hard way to continually function day in and day out. It could be that I miss my husband like crazy and it makes me tired just thinking of how much that really is. But in all honesty, it is probably just hormones. I'm up then down, then exhausted then full of energy (just ask Marcia and Deven... two nights ago I laid down on the couch for 3 minutes and passed out asleep dead to the world, today I made dinner then cleaned it up and did the dishes, switched the laundry and then was bouncing in my seat trying to think of more to get done). I am sure once I settle into a better routine (uh, like with a JOB!) that I will come back around to having something clever or witty to say.... but sadly, that day is not today.

On a more positive note, and the reason for opening this window (instead of climbing right into bed after I put Kaden down for the night) is that I bought a car today! There were a few things that were monumental about it. First, the car cost twice what my first "new" car cost, and I thought THAT was a lot! Haha. And second, I wrote a check for the full amount and drove away with it as MY car. I will be mailed the title and it will be all mine. It took me all 5 years to pay off my last car and I'd never even had a chance to see the title to it because by the time I paid the last payment, we were on our way to Abu Dhabi and they mailed it to my Aunt. Sighhhh. So THIS car really feels like mine. Plus, it is a hybrid (and '07 Toyota Prius for those without Facebook, hehe), so I can drive around feeling like I'm "doing my part" in the green effort (when really I just want to pay for gas much less often).

Anyway, that's about all I'm good for these days and I apologize for that. Maybe when I have my own computer and can dedicate more time to staring at an empty screen (or when Daddy is home again and I can pawn getting up with Kaden off on someone else) I will produce my typical, longer blogs. For now, I am going to go start a new book Marcia gave me about having sex with cannibals (which I really hope is NOT what it's about, but I'll let you know) and then I need to get to bed straight away because the Monk will be up early no matter what time I finally turn in.

In Case You Haven't Heard...

2009-11-10T08:22:00.003+04:00

Here is Kaden with his Papa for Walmart's poster advertising photos with Santa.

For those who have been living under a rock (i.e those without text/Facebook, hehe), I found out today that I am pregnant with baby number two! Yep, that whole week of trying really paid off! :) Stu and I are excited, and of course nervous, as I am sure anyone who is going to add a whole new family member to their family would be. I can't wait to begin this new journey of our lives.

One Happy Mommy. :)

Happy 46th Anniversary Mimi and Papa!

2009-11-09T07:27:00.005+04:00

Today we all relaxed and lounged around all day before Deven and Papa took Kaden to the "Wee" (playground) for a little while and then we headed out to dinner.

Douglas treated us all to a dinner at El Gallo Giro (the best Mexican food in the Treasure Valley) to celebrate Mimi and Papa's 46th Anniversary, which is actually tomorrow.

It was so good as usual and we all had such a good time laughing and hanging out. It's really too bad they are all leaving tomorrow because it has been so much fun the whole time they've been here. Hopefully we will just get opportunities to visit more often from now on.

Here are a few pics from the night that I took with my cell phone, so the quality isn't very good. Enjoy!

Kaden having the "cake" that Mimi and Papa got for their Anniversary.

Douglas and Mimi

Mimi and Papa. Happy Anniversary!

Marcia and Deven.

Thank a Veteran on the 11th.

2009-11-08T04:46:00.002+04:00

Well once again I have been FAIL blogger. I apologize for that but I know once I get my own place I will have my schedule more constant and then I will be back in the blogging world again.

This week we went out to dinner to El Giro Gallo with Melissa and Kyle for Kyle's 26th birthday. It was all super yummy of course and we had a great time.

Then Mimi and Papa got here on Thursday afternoon and then Doug came on Friday. We've been having a great time catching up and having fun.

This morning we headed to the Veteran's Day parade downtown (Deven, Papa, Kaden and I) which was actually pretty freezing and Kaden was kind of miserable. Check out the pics on my Facebook though if you're interested. I have never seen so many marching bands at one place before and it was great!

Then we came back home and I headed back downtown after Kaden's lunch time with Mimi and Doug to go to the Saturday market. We got several bottles of wine, some cinnamon pecans, crepes, and vegetables. It was really nice walking around down there and getting back into the feel of Boise again. I sure did miss it. This really is such a great town.

Not sure what is on the menu for tonight. Deven and Mitch are heading to a Hockey game but I don't know what I'll be doing.

I'd like to express my condolences to Lindsay about Stanford. :)

Halloween et cetera

2009-11-02T08:50:00.002+04:00

I’m starting to get quite a bit of slack for neglecting my blog lately so here’s what’s been going on since the last blog.

First, I didn’t get the job I really wanted, which totally sucks. But I have another interview set up for this coming week with an actually better job as far as pay goes. The hours still won’t be what I wanted, but beggars can’t be choosers.

Kristin and I took our boys to the pumpkin patch this weekend to pick out pumpkins which was pretty cool expect that it was freezing and my Kaden screamed for the last 20 minutes because he was cold and tired and cranky. It was one of the hundred times I keep thinking how much easier my life is with Stu around. He could have carried the pumpkin while I carried Kaden instead of me trying to balance both or alternating between poor Kristin lugging my pumpkin while I carried Kaden and me holding my pumpkin while I nudged Kaden on his butt to keep him walking in front of me. Either way, it wasn’t quite the outing we were looking for.

I also got to go to Kyle and Melissa’s last weekend for a barbecue and to chat and catch up which was wonderful. I’ve hung out with Melissa a couple times this week and it’s so nice having my best friend back within hang-out distance.

I headed over to Jo's the night before Halloween because we were supposed to be carving pumpkins, but we got to chatting and hanging out and it got pushed back and then it was past bedtime and we had to go. But it was really nice to see her whole family and talk with everyone since it's been so long that I've been able to sit and talk with them. I even talked to Mike about what actually happened with Ann (first-hand is always scarier than second) and we talked about her and favorite memories, etc. She is still not doing well and they had decided to remove life support when she suddenly made a turn for the better so they are still in limbo now playing the waiting game. I cannot imagine what that must feel like. It's hard enough for me and she isn't my own Mom. So keep the thoughts and prayers coming. They certainly couldn't hurt.

Halloween was pretty fun. I made dinner enough to feed an army (sloppy joes, corn, and mac and cheese) and Kristin, Kaden, Andy, Taylor, Melissa, and of course Marcia and Deven were there to eat and then take the little kids trick-or-treating (my Kaden’s first time ever). Kaden was totally confused at first, but soon got to hang of it and I was proud that our boys made it all the way around the big block before they were tired and ready to come back in. They got quite a bit of candy and we called it a night pretty early (because who knew that just taking 3 kids trick-or-treating could be so exhausting?)

Today Melissa and I went to Flower’s play (Frankenstein 1930) and it was totally cute. I was pretty impressed with the actors and it was definitely worth going to see. We had a good time. Then we headed to Fred Meyer to get a Crock Pot and Basketball Hoop that were on sale (yay for sale ads again!). It ended up being an adventure because they were “out” of them at the store we went to, so after 20 minutes of the stock boy looking and checking the back, he called 4 different Valley stores and they were all out of it too. We agreed that we were defeated and were leaving when the guy ran back up to us to tell us they’d found one (in the Barbie section on the top shelf in the very back) so we got the last one and Kaden LOVED it!

We picked up Papa Murphy’s on the way home, which, for those who are service members, you should know, they give 50% off the first pizza!!! So we got two pizzas for one and a half, which was great. We got back home tonight and I made crab dip and then we had the pizzas and then Melissa and I hung out until bed time. Now I’m trying to plow through this so I can get to sleep. I’m still feeling really crappy and though it has been a pretty fun day, it was also definitely a long one.

For those who are friends of mine on Facebook, I posted a new album with pics from Halloween as well as our first week back in Boise if you want to take a look.

First Few Days of American Life.

2009-10-26T18:13:00.007+04:00

Sorry I have been off the grid the past few days. Adjusting has been, well, quite an adjustment. I have had a terrible time of adjusting my sleep schedule and up until this morning was getting no more than 5 hours of sleep per night (and that was the long night) since I got here. I kept waking up between 3 and 4 every morning. Unfortunately, today I would have been able to keep sleeping, but Kaden decided to wake up screaming bloody murder at 6 AM so I had to get up too.
Yesterday Kaden and I got to ride with Flower (she has her learner's permit) to her school (yes, on a Sunday) to drop her off for play practice (at 10, which lasted until 9 at night... on a school night). Then we went shopping and Kaden was such a good boy that I got mini pizzas for us for lunch (which he LOVED). We got back and after Kaden had his yummy lunch, he got to go to the park with Uncle Deven and Aubrey. He had a great time and then while he napped, I got to go to Kyle and Melissa's for a barbecue. They're new house is so huge and so nice and it was wonderful getting to see and hang out with them. And Max (their pit bull) only jumped on me twice, hehe. I can't WAIT for Stu to come home and have playdates with them often. There was super yummy food and we watched the Dolphins lose, much to Kyle's dismay. :) It was great to chat for so long and catch up with everything that has been going on in their lives since we've been gone.

I came back while Kaden was just up from nap and enjoying some lasagna and garlic bread for dinner and then we tried to watch Cars but our DVD skips on their player, which sucked. We made it to bed around 10.

Today I have that second interview at Idaho State University, which is the job I am hoping to get. And I also have another interview at the Department of Corrections. That job is M-F 8-5, so it would but a big strain on working out a school schedule, so that one does not sound as good for me right now. Same job description at both though, so that part wouldn't really change.

I do hope to have a job soon though to have a bit more structure in my life. I feel sort of disjointed having so much free time and unscheduled time. It's weird. Maybe a job will make living in America again feel more permanent. So far, it's kind of this odd vacation I feel like I've been on.

I miss Stu like crazy. I keep trying to rationalize ways he can come home early, but he thinks we should just have him finish out the contract and then come home (which DOES make the most rational sense, but I'm ruled by my emotions a lot lately) (And no, I'm not pregnant. Stupid ovulation schedule.).

Anyway, so here's hoping I get that job and that things go smoothly (and quickly) with regard to the upcoming holidays and Stu's coming home.

On a terrible note, my friend Joslyn's mom contracted swine flu and got pneumonia as a result. She then had a heart attack the other night and was put in a hypothermic coma to protect her and the doctors have been trying to draw her out of it for a few days now, to no avail as of yet. Jo said yesterday that they are preparing them for the worst and that they are to make plans to say goodbye. I have been wishing (I'm not a reliable "pray"-er and I think I'd just screw it up) my hardest for the best for her, so any good thoughts, prayers, etc. could do nothing but help. They have been through so much in the past few years, the last thing they need is to lose her Mom. Ann is a wonderful woman.

Here are some pics of our first few days here:

Me, 3:30 in the morning, the night we got here after WAAAAY too many hours of no sleep.

My first time driving in WAAAAY too long! :)

Kaden's super cool new Cars room.

Kaden all bundled up and ready to play outside!

Aunt Marcia rocks!

Hell On Earth (Er, Hell In The Air)

2009-10-23T08:18:00.001+04:00

So, I’ve kind of been putting off writing this blog, both because I’m still drunk feeling from so much sleep deprivation, but also because I’d really rather not even think about my trip and maybe the memory of it will fade and it will never really have happened. Yeah, it was pretty much that bad. I was really hoping to be pleasantly surprised, but it was even worse than I anticipated.

We started off the day easily enough, getting up at 6:30 and having a simple breakfast before heading off to the airport. It was really hard for me to leave Stu. As excited as I was to be going home, I was equally as upset (or more so) that I was leaving my husband and my best friend on the other side of the world. Because we’ve been living overseas for so long, with few friends and no family, Stu and I really learned how to become a well-oiled working unit. We are best friends as well as partners and I can’t remember the last decision I made that I didn’t talk about with Stu first. So just the thought of not having him by my side was pretty emotional for me.

We got checked in and Stu left us as far as he could go, which was the entrance to immigration. I was crying before I even got to the counter and the Emirati guy looked me over then looked at Stu and he said, “That is his father?” And I said yes and he told me, “It is even harder for him, you know, to watch you leave, he just has to hold it inside because this is what a man must do.” Which of course, didn’t help, and I sobbed my way through the terminal (quietly, lest I draw even more attention to the lone white girl) and then proceeded to walk laps around terminal 1 (for those who have been Abu Dhabi airport, there is a huge circle which each of the gates connect to). After 2 hours and 46 laps, it was time to board.

Kaden flat out refused to wear his seatbelt and screamed at a pitch dogs probably can’t even hear, as I held him down and tried to keep him from arching his back and flopping himself out of the seat. Needless to say, it was not a happy take-off for me or any of our fellow passengers. My child.

He got a kick out of the entertainment system again for about an hour and then was crabby because it was nearing nap time. I’m going to pause right here and say to those of you who suggested Benadryl, you suck. I gave him some and an hour later, not only was he NOT sleeping, he was like a monkey on crack, bouncing around in his seat and freaking out. This went on for the remainder of the plane ride. We went for about 50 “walks” (our flight was 16 hours) to the bathroom and to say hello to his favorite flight attendant (a fugly looking French gal who appeared to be on her 5th 16-hour flight in a row, poor girl). I will spare you the gory details, but let’s just say Kaden was NOT on his best behavior as he promised to be and neither he nor Mommy got any sleep at all until he finally fell asleep AFTER the captain came on to tell us we would soon be landing. He slept for an hour total. Ugh.

Chicago. Let me preempt this by saying what a great airport Chicago O’Hare is. Not only were the people refreshingly polite and helpful (one of the ground staff helped me get all my carry-on luggage situated on me and then handed Kaden to me because my gate-checked stroller had to go through the baggage claim (fuckers). So I hauled my now-drowsy lead baby to customs, which went surprisingly fast. Unlike Raleigh where they only had two kiosks open to deal with a flight of several hundred people, Chicago was well-staffed and we got through pretty quickly. I was directed to a line that was diplomats or active military and then a nice Marine allowed me to go ahead of him because I was a pack-mule. The guy at customs welcomed me “home” (thank you!!! :) ) and then asked about what myself and husband did in Abu Dhabi. It took literally 15 seconds (while I watched a group of 10 Pakistanis get lead into a separate screening room, then later saw them leave said room and enter their new terminal some 3 hours later) and then I was off to claim my baggage.

I’m not going to lie, this part sucked. They had told me there would be porters who work for tips but I couldn’t a-one, so I kept dragging Kaden and our over-packed carry-ons around hauling bags out of the carousel and onto a cart. I pushed both the cart (loaded down with 200 pounds worth of crap) and the stroller to where I needed to get my boarding pass for my next flight. Etihad had checked my bags on to Boise, so I just had to drop them off there, which was nice.

Then started to process called keeping-a-sleep-deprived-monkey-on-crack-happy-for-the-next-4-hours. I sat down a grand total of maybe a half hour in 4 hours waiting for our next flight because every time I stopped walking the stroller around Kaden would start to cry or whine and I was just so exhausted I was far happier to walk my feet raw than to deal with a stressed-out crying 2-year-old.

We boarded the next plane and got all seated and ready to go on the flight to Boise. Kaden fell asleep as soon as his seatbelt was on and everything appeared to be looking up. Wrong. Our plane broke. The captain came on and said there was a reading in the cockpit that said there was hot air leaking into places it shouldn’t be and that the mechanics were going to run tests to see if the problem was a computer problem or if the problem actually existed. After about 45 minutes of aiting on the plane he came back on to tell us that the computer was right, there was hot air leaking into the wing and it was a fire hazard and that he didn’t want to add more excitement to our lives, so this plane was unflyable and had to be towed to the airplane-fixing shop. We got off the plane again and waited around for them to see if they could get us another plane. An hour later the pilot was standing a few feet in front of me (Kaden had just earned his wings and was hamming it up to the pilot) when he got a text that made him say “shit” (obvious follow-up question from me: “What?”) . “Well, we’ve got another plane, but it doesn’t land here until 11:45, which means we wouldn’t land in Boise until well after 2 AM.” (“Shit”, indeed.)

A bit later it was confimed that we could have that plane, but that it was hurrying up and would land at 10:45 instead. It landed at 11:15 and we were all boarded and ready to take off by 11:30 (we’d already had practice so we were pretty good at it the second time around). It’s funny the camaraderie that takes place under stress. You feel like you get to know people when you go through crises with them (however minor). My seat buddy was an elder Mormon man (naturally) from Boise who was an eager listener and questioner when it came to the Middle East. We talked forever and he even offered to have his wife drop us off at home when she came to get him (as we found out they live a mere couple of blocks from Marcia and Deven). A very nice man, which came in handy when my son, now definitely NOT sleeping, entered the second plane and again refused to buckle up, flinging his body around and screaming at the top of his lungs. Luckily, though, after 8 hours in the airport, following such a long flight, his resolve was not as strong as mine and he gave up and collapsed asleep against my lap for about an hour. He woke up and was in a pretty good for the rest of the 4 hour flight and even got to watch the lights of Boise on our approach.

I tried to cut out the meat, so it really sounds like a decent and short enough trip, but I’m still trying to recover. Heh. We got to the airport and Marcia and Deven were waiting for us and even Joslyn got her pregnant body up and to the airport at 2 in the morning to welcome us home. :) It was so nice to see happy, familiar faces after such a long time of no sleep. We got our bags and barely all fit in the car (the stroller was practically on Marcia’s lap) and got home, where it was DEAD SILENT outside, which was an eerie thing after so long of constant noise. Kaden got to meet his new bedroom which Marcia had completely done in Cars stuff! The bedspread, curtains, even the walls are all Cars themed. It is soooo cool and Kaden just loved it.

He looked slightly terrified when I put him to bed in his new scary room, then he asked for his Daddy, which nearly made me collapse on the floor and cry that I wanted his Daddy too, but I held it together long enough to put him to bed. After calling Stu and leaving like 3 voicemails (the Vonage was down, of course, so I couldn’t actually hear him) I finally made it to bed by about 4:45 AM.

Unfortunately I had an interview scheduled for 10 AM the next day (today) so I only got about 3 hours of sleep when Kaden woke up crying at about 8 AM. He was in a strange place and completely exhausted, poor kid. But he got some breakfast and chatted with Aunt Marcia while I got ready (“ready” used lightly, I threw my hair in a bun, put on wrinkly clothes and smeared a ton of concealer under my puffy, bloodshot eyes before heading downstairs for my own cereal.

Marcia offered her car but I got her to drive me to my interview (hey, I haven’t really driven in a year and a half and I didn’t know where I was going, it felt intimidating) with Kaden in tow. They occupied themselves while I interviewed by heading to Winco for a few supplies and then Starbucks where Kaden got his own water with a straw.

My interview went very well. They seemed pretty impressed with me (especially the part about me being there some 8 hours after my plane landed and almost no sleep) and liked my answers to their questions. But of course you only ever know your own take on things, so we will just have to wait and see how it went.

Kaden and I went back down for nap at about 1 (2 for me because I was IMing with Stu, hehe) and became dead to the world. I had asked Deven to not let me sleep past 4 so I can try to get our schedules back on track but Marcia came in at 5:30 and said Deven had tried to wake me up but I wouldn’t hear of it. I had even missed two calls and 3 texts with my volume on my phone on full and I still slept like a rock.

Sarah and Ella came over in the evening to say hello and bring Kaden a present, but I felt like I’d been hit by a Mack truck by then. I hope tonight’s sleep goes well and tomorrow we’re feeling better. Kaden is already in bed and I am heading there too now.

Farewell Abu Dhabi!

2009-10-20T09:12:00.002+04:00

It’s finally here. Today is my last day as a resident in the United Arab Emirates. And I am up, greeting the day (after about 5 hours of sleep), while my boys are sleeping peacefully. :)

I’m not sure what to do today. Last night we talked about going to the beach for the last time, but then I thought of all the sandy clothes I’d have to hurry-wash (no such thing in my 5-hour-per-cycle washer/dryer). Plus, who wants to travel with sunburn? So, Kaden needs shoes that are not sandals and his sandals that he has now smell like stinky feet because he always sweats in them, so new shoes are in order. So are some Goldfish crackers to help keep Kaden happy on our trip.

But now I am feeling slightly panicky, like I’m forgetting to pack or do something. Last night we were watching The Amazing Race on AFN (LOVE that show, if anyone wants to do it with me, I am so there!) and they were in Dubai. It was cool knowing how to get to all the places they needed to find while they got lost and stressed and didn’t understand the taxi drivers, but it also reminded me that we never went to Wadi Wadi or Altantis like we talked about going. Crap. Now I’m out of chances to do it. Stu asked me last night if there was anywhere I wanted to go today or anything special I wanted to do, but I got sad thinking about it and he said, “We can’t go everywhere.” True dat.

So instead, I think we’ll enjoy our day as a family because we’re going to be without Daddy for a few months (see how if I say it like that it doesn’t seem too long? Don’t be fooled, I’m scared shitless and I have NO idea how I am going to survive a week, let alone 3 months without my Stuie).

Poor Stu just doesn’t understand the concept of my being sad about leaving. He told me can’t empathize because, “I hate this fucking place”. He reminded me that it is happy that I am leaving and I’ve already been excited about the things I’ll be able to do once I get back (stay tuned for my short list), but even still, apart from feeling almost paralyzed with the fear of travelling alone with Kaden for so many hours… I know I did it once, but I’m still traumatized by it and I’m terrified to do it again. I still feel like it sucks that I’m leaving. I’m going to miss my girls like crazy. I anticipated those get-togethers for the entire month leading up to each them. But I will have my own friends back and will surely make new friends eventually.

So, to end this on a positive note, here is my list of 10 things I want to do when I get home:

1. Eat a pizza that has REAL sausage on it, dipped in Catalina dressing (my tummy is growling just imagining it)

2. Text my new number to everyone I’ve ever met and enjoy a solid week of unadulterated texting fun!

3. Go to Walmart and buy everything I need in ONE place, for HALF the price it is here, INCLUDING pork sausage and pork chops and bacon and…

4. Take Kaden for a walk around the neighborhood without being leered at, propositioned for sex, or getting heat stroke.

5. Walk up to anyone, anywhere, and know that they will both speak English, and understand my own English.

6. Get a house, set up utilities, chat with my neighbors, and acquire appliances and NOT HAVE TO CONTACT MY EMPLOYER TO DO SO.

7. Feel politically incorrect about making generalizations about certain groups of people again. (i.e. Filipinos like to sing American songs in high-pitched, off-key voices, Emirati women KNOW they’re better than you are, regardless of who you are, and Emirati men wear dishdashas while they drive around in their white SUVs that still have plastic on the seats, Pakistani and Indian men do not understand why eye-raping a pretty (or painfully ugly) girl is inappropriate.)

8. One word: Drive-thrus

9. Eat quality Mexican food

10. Finally have my friends and family back within visiting distance!

Kaden at the airport, ready to head to Abu Dhabi.

Kaden the first night we were here. (on the roof)

My boy now!

Welcome Baby Felix!

2009-10-18T15:48:00.002+04:00

Congratulations to Charmaine and Chi Wai on their brand new baby Felix Gar Ming Alfred Choy! He was born at 2:50 AM (Abu Dhabi time) and weighed 8 pounds, 2 ounces. Mom and baby are both reportedly doing great. :)

Girls' Goodbye.

2009-10-18T15:40:00.002+04:00

Yesterday we had a little get-together at Kundi's as both an opportunity for me to say goodbye as well as a chance for Kundi to see the girls again as she was in Zimbabwe for a few weeks to mourn her mother's passing and missed our monthly get-together.

It was billed as a pot-luck and once again we shone. :) Asma'a came once again, with her beautiful 7-month-old daughter Misk in tow. Misk is so stinking cute. I wanted to kidnap her to America with me with her full-head of curls and olive skin. It made me want to have another baby so bad! Sweet girl.

Anyway, in addition to the food, the always-thoughtful ladies also got me some going away presents! I didn't expect anything like that and it was all so thoughtful. Lindsay knew I needed stitch markers, so now I have them :) as well as new knitting needles that have interchangeable points so you can swap them out for the correct size you need. How cool! She also threw in a stitch counter and they all signed a card for me, which was included with the gift from Hala that was a beautiful book of Abu Dhabi photos. I looked through it there and back home with Stu and we kept saying how we'd been everywhere in it and how wonderful it will be to have a visual aid to tell our stories of our adventures once we go home. Such thoughtful women, they will truly be missed.

We took some fun photos too which I'll have to get from Hala and post on here.

Reality Is Setting In.

2009-10-16T20:32:00.002+04:00

We just got back from dinner with "the boys": Matt, Mike, Dan (and Brigitte), and Steve at the Lebanese Flower. I was looking forward to this dinner as a chance to say goodbye to the food as well as the people, but I didn't expect to feel quite as sad as I did.

The actually hanging out was great. Kaden was kind of a shit, but we DID hang out for 2 hours, so who can blame a two-year-old for hitting his threshold? Lol. We got to laugh and joke and share stories as we always do, but the goodbye part sucked.

I hugged Dan first and was feeling pretty good about saying goodbye... but by the time I got to Matt, I almost lost it (but kept myself in check because he asked earlier in the night if I was going to cry). He was wearing a blue shirt tonight and it reminded me of walking through the mass of people coming out of Abu Dhabi International Airport on my first night here. After a solid day of flying with a 7-month-old, with as many issues as we had, I was just about at my wit's end when out of the crowd of veils and dark skin, came a well-over-six-foot-tall white boy. :) I knew Matt was himself the minute I saw him and hugging him tonight reminded me of that first night, hugging him as he "saved me" from the strange new world I'd just stepped into. (He made me feel even more at home as he blasted Christina Aguilera's "Dirty" on the radio as we flew at deadly speeds back to his apartment before Stu's flight arrived.)

I'm definitely going to miss Mike's infectious happiness and the all-around good-hearted nature of these boys. And Mike is right, "This sucks."

Welcome Baby Adelyn!

2009-10-15T11:39:00.003+04:00

Miss Christy finally had her beautiful baby girl at 9:17 PM on October 14th. She was 8 pounds and she is absolutely beautiful! My Mom was there for the birth and said Christy was trooper and she did amazingly well. Congrats Christy and Kyle!

Here are some pics of the new addition to the family and her amazing Mommy! :)

Sticker Shock.

2009-10-15T10:05:00.002+04:00

So, last night I got a call from a college in Idaho asking me if I would be interested in an Administrative Assistant position (I'd tell you which one, but I don't want other people Jonesin' for my future job, hehe). The job is a State job (which equals State benefits), is only 30 hours a week and is in the evenings and on Saturday, which would free up my whole day to go to school. Which in my mind sounds pretty perfect. :)

So it brought a few things to light: first, Stu realized for the first time exactly what going to school full time and working meant. He said, "But I'll never see you." I asked him what he expected and he was at a loss for words. "The next two years are going to suck." Indeed.

So then we did the math and with the hours and the pay, my monthly salary would come out to $200 less than Stu makes EVERY WEEK! We put what I would be making for the WHOLE month into savings EVERY WEEK right now. Wow. So, I'll get to work my butt off 30 hours a week, missing my evenings with my family, for the price of living here, making what we do in a week. It really reminds us how much more money we make here. While I still think going home and living a real life, with friends and family, is what is most important, it sure IS hard to walk away from that kind of money. Stu quipped, "We're going to be poor again like normal people." Lol.

Leaving For Good.

2009-10-14T09:43:00.002+04:00

So as most of my lovely readers know by now, Kaden and I are heading back stateside on October 21st. It sure feels like it has been a long time coming! Poor Stuie has to stay here for a bit longer (we'll have to wait and see how things play out to determine what exactly a "bit" means). But these past few days have been just so weird. It's such a different experience thinking of something in the abstract (we're leaving at some undetermined point) and then actually putting it into practice (we're leaving in 6 days).

Last night we went shopping at Hamdan Center, which, as you'll recall, is a little series of sort of dodgy local shops downtown that sell souvenirs and cheap knock-off designer duds. We had a few more things to pick up and walking through a place I'd been so many times had an odd air of nostalgia to it that, before, had always been a curious stench of unwashed bodies, old dirt, and bad cologne. And then while driving home, it had already gotten dark, and the city really is beautiful when the dark veils the bad aspects. We stopped for shawarmas at the Lebanese Flower on the way home and they were as good as ever.

As I was emailing Marcia this morning I had a thought: This is the first time I'm leaving from a place I've lived for quite a long time, to which I never intend to return. When I left Coeur d'Alene, I was ready to be free of it, but I also knew I'd be back many many times in the future to visit. When I left Arizona, my aunt and uncle basically came too (within a short time of me leaving) and I see my grandparents plenty. When we left Boise, we left fully intending to return. But now, for the first time, I am leaving a place where I have friends and favorite places and a routine and weather I've become accustomed to, and I'll never be back.

I can't WAIT to start a new life in Boise, because that's what it will be. We couldn't have come here, experienced all we have, and expected to return to the "same" life we left, but I think we are better for it. I even have plans already for when I get back (thanks, Jo, hehe), but it doesn't quite feel right.

I'm meeting up with my girls this weekend at Kundi's and then maybe with the boys too for a "last meal" at the Flower and while I'm so excited and anticipating going "home" (to Boise), I find myself unable to swallow this lump in my throat, imagining never being here again.

I'm so glad I kept this blog all this time so I can always look back (read back) and remember all the things we've done and experienced here. Stu said yesterday, "I can't believe we went to Rome!" Someday it might be, "I can't believed we lived in Abu Dhabi." or "I can't believe we went on a desert safari on Christmas Eve." (which I still think is one of the best and most awesome memories I have from here).

I know I will look back fondly on my life here. When I drive home in the snow from a whole day of work and school and flop into a chair without a plan for dinner, I know I will look back on my life here and miss when I was stuck inside all day with nothing to do EXCEPT make dinner. :) When that day comes, may I find myself smiling at the memory.

This and That.

2009-10-10T20:39:00.002+04:00

We had another good weekend here in the UAE. :) Thursday night we ordered pizza, which is Kaden’s FAVORITE food, so he was a happy camper. We also got to talk to Momma E which was very nice and then we ended our night with a movie and cuddling.

Friday was our monthly Amiras meeting and as usual, coffee with the girls was wonderful and a nice change of pace from my typical routine of boys-everything. It’s nice to gossip and talk babies and knit and all wonder of non-male-oriented things. Charmaine is THIS CLOSE to popping and I just can’t wait to meet her new little man.

Me, Charmaine and Rama with Charmaine's new baby blanket that her knitting froup from Australia made for her and sent along with her Mom. It made all of us cry as she unfolded it and all the little tags hung off of it indicating which member knit which piece. So sweet. She sure is loved!

Today we had pancakes and then headed off to Heritage Village to get some more magnets for Mimi. It turned out there was something going on later in the day as everything was blocked off with Police barriers (which we drove around, hehe) and they were setting up portable metal detectors (who knew?). But Kaden got a chance to visit the old, decrepit camel that lives there, which made his day. One of the little Ethiopian ladies who runs one of the shops gave him a little camel trinket and he blushed. Hehe. We left the house at 9:30 and by 10:30 we were all sweaty and starting to get sun burns so we said hello to the ducks and then headed home (with shoes full of sand that Kaden ATE on the way home! Ewwww)

I started a new book which mercifully doesn’t suck as bad at the last 6 books I’ve read or started to read and gave up on, so I plowed through half of it today. I made spaghetti and meatballs for dinner (and garlic bread, Kaden’s favorite, and veggies that we all took bites of at the same time to make “veggies sooo nummy!”) and we watched The Kingdom for the 200th time before starting the bed time routine.

For those inquisitive minds, we’re still waiting to hear any word. Underwriters suck.

Fast Fast!

2009-10-08T09:38:00.002+04:00

Dancing Boy.

2009-10-08T09:29:00.002+04:00

He got embarrassed and I haven't been able to catch him dancing again because every time I bring out the camera he stops what he was doing, but here is a little taste of my little dancer boy. Lol.

Happy Birthday Stu!

2009-10-06T10:41:00.003+04:00

Yesterday was Stu's 26th birthday and Kaden and I made him a cake and then Kaden painted him a masterpiece complete with handprints and everything. He has a great time and then got to wash off in the bath. Daddy loved his painting and his new toy (Xbox 360 with several games).

As soon as Stu walked into the house after work, Kaden started singing Happy Birthday to him like we had talked about earlier and it was the cutest thing ever! Then he got embarrassed and ran off. Lol.

I made Thai Coconut Chicken Soup and vegetable fried rice for dinner and then we enjoyed the cake afterwards. We ended the night by watching Jumper with popcorn. Stu said it was a pretty good birthday. Here are the pics!

Kaden thrilled at the idea of painting on a real canvas. :)

Finger painting! (thnaks, Aunt Mo for the painting supplies!)

Concerned about the mess her was making. Hehe

Wondering why Mommy kept taking pictures of him.

After the painting, in the tub, he wrote the word "Go" (see it???) on the bottom of the tub. Genius baby! Hehe

Dadddy's cake.

Daddy holding up his amazing painting and his other new toy and cake.

Blowing out his candles! :)

This Week in Abu Dhabi

2009-10-03T11:41:00.005+04:00

So, we've been working with our lender(s) to try to get this pre-approval process done and over with, but because we paid off all our debt and now have nothing, we have no credit lines to show that we can pay our bills. Unfortunately all of our bills we do pay on a regular basis (the ones in Abu Dhabi) do not report to American credit (duh). So we're hoping the manual underwriting process works in our favor. Otherwise, it is getting a little close to the end of the year to hope to close before we plan for Stu to come home. In that case we may have to rethink our grand plan.

Sooooo, we (meaning Kaden and I) may or may not be coming home soon. We would still need to come back before Stu to get a house ready to live in (rented or purchased, we need somewhere to live) and would YOU want to set up a house with high-stress Stu? Yeah, me neither. Haha. So we will just have to see what happens in the next few weeks (this process takes longer too... another fun part). Very worst-case scenario, it's still only two months away, but best case scenario is probably two weeks (or more).

But, on to more fun things. Kaden got to go to Toys R Us yesterday, which he calls "The Apple Place" because it is right next to the fruit and vegetable market, (where they sells apples) so that's what he associates it with. He had a great time and he's even getting the hang of the bikes, even though they're a bit too big for him. I can't wait to get a my baby his first bike! How fun!

In other news, Stu's "big boy" (says Kaden) 26th birthday is on Monday. His awesome wife got him an Xbox 360 and 4 games. :) Kaden said he didn't want to get Daddy anything, so we will be working on his gift (and attitude) at the beginning of this coming week.

Here are some of my Monk in the tub being a little ham. (And Mommy's super awesome I'm-indulging-because-I'm-stressed-and-I-can dessert of coffee with whipped cream and a Brownie)

"Gimme hug Mommy!" (And of course I obliged... sweet soaking wet baby!)

Musings About Perspective, Part 3

2009-09-27T09:19:00.003+04:00

I know I’ve kind of been off the grid for a few days, weeks, whatever. Sorry about that. I’ve been pretty busy doing the hurry-up-and-wait thing, which sucks. After deciding I would go home early to buy a house, we’ve been stuck in this weird place of rushing to get everything to the lender, and now just waiting for a go-ahead from her. Part of why I haven’t been blogging is because I feel kind of weird about the feelings I’ve been having regarding leaving and I’m not sure how to word it right. (But you know me! I’m going to give it a go regardless :))

On one hand, I’ve been excited to leave here since I arrived, just persevering for the most part. But as soon as I’m faced with the opportunity to finally go home, I’ve become accustomed to being here and I… ahem… like it. I didn’t expect to accept my life here as anything other than a temporary hardship for our family until we can get back home and start living the life we’ve been striving for. But something happened in the past few months, and that something is apparently acceptance (the elusive 5th stage, for those who are keeping track, heh). I don’t have that NEED to get away anymore and I think I finally understand how some people come here and stay for years and years. It always used to shock me when I met people who’d been here longer than a year or two, but now I understand how this lifestyle can become commonplace in your mind, and not just weird. And you can get to a point where you like it.

So now, it basically sucks. Because instead of rushing away from here without looking back, before I’ve even left I’m already regretting leaving the things I will miss. People aside, (which is going to be the hardest part by far, leaving my friends) I know I’m going to miss the weather, hot as Hell though it may be, I haven’t felt cold in MONTHS other than just turning to the A/C too far down. I’m going to miss the malls and all their excessive splendor and décor. It’s become habit to head to a mall and have dinner somewhere. Going to dinner is a different experience in America. I love that, but this fits, too.

And I think that’s finally the bottom line. With acceptance came a strange sort of longing for my life here. Yes, I can’t wait to get Verizon back and be on the messaging front lines once again (and make up for lost time, hehe. Prepare yourselves!). I can’t wait to drive myself, without the threat of death every time I belt up. I can’t WAIT to be nearer to my family and all my friends that I missed so much. I can find everything I need to cook my favorite dishes at one store, etc.
But each of those things, that used to feel so important, now has a counter to them in this life.

I’m used to Etisalat and their fees and poor customer service. I’ll probably never get another text in Arabic again after I leave here. :) I’ll probably even miss the adrenaline rush that comes with buckling up here, and the excitement of going to Spinneys for the “good stuff” as a treat, not just being able to get it easily from any old store.

I certainly won’t miss washing dishes by hand. I won’t miss my combo washer/dryer that doesn’t actually dry. I won’t miss my life being covered by a haze of sand 24/7. I won’t miss being glared at, or feeling uncomfortable in a tank top or shorts. I definitely won’t miss the excessive prices on everything from food to clothes.

But again, this fits, too. Who knew? :)

The biggest thing is leaving Stu. Looking back over the past two years is a trip. We were completely different people when we got married. I know we loved each other then, but we’ve come full circle as far as maturity goes. We’ve developed from single, selfish-minded people into a unit. We’re always “we” and “us” now and it’s so much better for both of us. And I KNOW that. We’re so much happier than we were when we ever were back home and that has all been because of this experience forcing us to lean on one another exclusively because we didn’t HAVE any other friends or family to turn to. In retrospect, coming here was probably the best thing we could have done for us as a couple and as parents, let alone for our bank account. So leaving, quite literally, my other half, here all alone and going to America all alone with our son is scary for me in ways I’ve never considered before. I’ve never loved this man more than I do today. And it keeps getting better with each week that passes and we make more memories and jokes and fun.

All this time we’ve been planning when “we” were leaving and I always pictured us doing all of this together. But once again, life has its own way of doing things, and I think me being forced to do things on my own without being codependent will make me a stronger person, and Stu relying on himself instead of having everything done for him will help him appreciate the things I do a bit more (not that he doesn’t, but the guy hasn’t had to wash his own drawers for over two years now). So again, this can be such a good thing for our relationship. How many couples have the opportunity to take a step back from their marriages and re-appreciate what they have in each other? (I still think it sucks though and I’m going to whine a bit more about it from time to time)

Here are some pictures of this week. Thank you Marcia, Mo, and Mimi for boxes! It was great to get them all at the same time! Kaden is having a hay day with his new Cars stuff and we’re LOVING our snacks. And Mo, thanks a MILLION for the new crafting projects to keep up busy for the next few weeks! Great idea!

Kaden leading the way at the park.

The fountain at the park (and Kaden getting more sunblock on... always with the heat, hehe)

After our Macaroni Grill experience, I invented this mushroom sauce for whole wheat pasta that is seriously sooooo close to the sauce on the ravioli at MG. I'll have that flavor yet! Stu said it made the top 5 of his favorite meals that I make. :)

Kaden with his new Cars bowl. He loves it!

Asking Daddy if it is McQueen in his bowl.

New Cars sunglasses! One cool kid!

Eid in Dubai.

2009-09-20T12:50:00.006+04:00

Eid Mubarak everyone! Stu has a few days off for Eid, which is wonderful, so we decided to celebrate and to break up the days off, we would head to Dubai for some R&R time. We got up in the morning and got all packed up and headed off after an early lunch. We arrived in Dubai and checked into our hotel room at the Le Meridien (after a slight near-catastrophe because I forgot my passport and they almost didn’t let us check in). The room was beautiful and nicely equipped for the price.

We headed off to Dubai Festival City, which is really just a glorified mall, and we walked around for a few hours and took in a HUGE two-story Toys R Us which Kaden didn’t want to leave, before going to Macaroni Grill for dinner.

We got seated and were starving by the time Iftar started and we decided to have the Iftar feast (it was the last day of Ramadan, why not?) We had a Shrimp and Spinach dip for an appetizer, which was absolutely amazing, the bread with olive oil and balsamic vinegar, and we ordered tomato basil soup (holy crap yum!), garden salad, Mushroom Ravioli for the main course and Tiramisu for dessert. Let me just say that aside from my favorite meal of mushroom fettuccine in Italy, this was the best meal I’ve had in over a year and a half. I absolutely HAVE to get the recipe for the ravioli. It was amazing.

Afterwards, we walked near the canal a bit and then headed back to the hotel for some relaxing. We all got showers and got cuddled down and then watched part of a movie before turning in for the night. I learned two things last night. First, a hate feather pillows. The bed was amazingly comfortable, but Stu and I both slept terribly because the pillows were so terrible. Second, my son talks in his sleep. I thought he was just awake and talking so I went over to his bed to lay him back down but he was already laying down and his eyes were closed. I was like, “Kaden?” and he sniffed and rolled over. I heard him a few more times, odd baby. Lol

We got up around 7 and cuddled for a bit before heading down to breakfast. Now, 50 bucks for breakfast for two people IS pretty steep, but BOY was it good! I had an omelet and several items from the continental section (fruit, breads, jam, fresh squeezed grapefruit juice, etc) and Stu had awesome eggs Benedict. Stu and Kaden headed up to the room when Kaden started to get a bit bored and I got to enjoy the rest of my toast and coffee in peace and quiet. Quite the treat!

We got dressed in swimwear and headed for the pool (1 of the 3). Kaden was a bit timid and was pissed when he thought it was the “ocean” and couldn’t locate his Momma E anywhere. We enjoyed some relaxing quiet pool time and then headed back to the room to get ready to head home.

We got to see a herd of camels on the way to Abu Dhabi, which is always fun. And then, we saw the completed “round” building they have been working on for a long time.

We all agreed it was a very nice mini-vacation for everyone.

Here are some pics from the mini-trip. I apologize in advance for the excessive amount of black and whites. After a year of having our camera, I finally started reading the book it came with and learned how to take B&Ws. Because I already have a TON of pics of Dubai in color, I took most of these without.

Kaden ready to head to Dubai!

Daddy getting some snacks for the trip.

Burj Dubai. Getting ever taller.

Le Meridien.

Kaden checking out the room.

The obligatory self-portrait. :)

Kaden thought the closet was the coolest part of the room (it had a sliding door).

Slippers and stuff.

An espresso machine in the room. I definitely took advantage of this lovely contraption! :)

We were still in a Muslim country so I had to find the arrow to Mecca. Here it is! On the bed side table.

Tons of fun freebies! (And that flower was real)

I do believe this was our first 5 star hotel.

The carousel at Dubai Festival City.

Myself on a bridge over the canal.

This one is just for Mo! :) We thought of you.

Kaden driving a Ferrari

"Sinus-sores!"

This dragon growled and roared. Loud.

Kaden by the pool (he looks mad in this pic, but it was really just sunny.)

Is this picture not the epitome of vacation or what? :) Love it!

My boys enjoying swimmin' time!

Time to head home! Sleepy baby.

If you look closely, you can see 3 or so camels.

And here is the odd round building. :)

Musings About Perspective, Part 2

2009-09-16T08:38:00.004+04:00

So, I wasn't even going to write this blog. Stu and I had a conversation yesterday that could just as easily have remained private, but it also illustrated just exactly how far we've come and how much we've changed since moving here over 18 months ago...

I was forwarded an email (and I know a lot of you got the same one) about an upcoming gathering of Muslims in Washington DC (for the close of Ramadan this year). The forward encouraged us to check out the website and "read the last line" in the website which said "Our Time Has Come." The email thought we should be very afraid.

So here's the thing. I remember 9/11 like it was yesterday, too. I can share my story about where I was and what happened just like every other American can (and in fact got a scholarship in college for an essay I wrote about the subject, hehe). And sure, maybe two years ago, I would have read said email and looked through the website, and maybe it would have inspired fear. But not this day. It pains me to even say this, but having live along-side Muslims for this long, I can assure you, they may not have a very good sense of humor, and they may be more reserved than Americans, but they are not terrorists. Not the majority. Just like all of the NRA rednecks in Northern Idaho are not Aryan Nations followers (regardless of how shaved their heads may be).

Stu came home and was talking about how one person in the forward had said we should be terrified of this upcoming gathering, he said, "that's just ignorant". This is the key thing here. Sure, there are bad people in this world, but it isn't one culture or one religion. Just as in illiterate, backwoods Alabama, preachers can convince their followers that the black man is the Devil incarnate and to hate them, so can Imams in Northern illiterate Pakistan convince their followers that the Koran says white people and their ways are inherently evil and they should kill them. But that doesn't mean the majority of either of these religions are evil future killers on the loose.

I do not speak Arabic, so I cannot tell you for sure what the Koran does say, but for the most-part, the Muslims I know, just like the Christians and Pagans I know, are a peaceful people who are just misunderstood. Maybe if everyone else would try to look a bit further than the surface of things, they might feel more comfortable with other people's differences. Life is about balance, not about being right and wrong all the time. I just want to be a bit more balanced.

So here's the thing: I'm still a Republican, Idaho girl at heart. I'm not about to burn my bra or hug a tree, or fly a rainbow flag, but if living here has taught me nothing else, I've realized how dangerous ignorance can be. A little perspective goes a long way. A bunch of Muslims meeting on Capitol Hill is nothing to get worked up over. Seriously. Let them practice their religion in peace.

Me with my favorite Muslim :)

Night-Night!

2009-09-15T08:39:00.002+04:00

I have it so easy when it come to putting my son down for the night!

Charmaine's Baby Shower!

2009-09-14T13:47:00.008+04:00

Sorry I haven't updated in a few days. It's been hectic here (Weird, you say? I know, right?) for the past week or so.

This weekend was another great one. Thursday night we met Dan and Mike at Cantina Laredo for Mexican food, which we haven't had in WAY too long and I filled up on Queso before my meal even arrived.

Friday started early for me, making chimichangas to take to Charmaine's surprise baby shower (woot woot!) and then heading to Toys R Us to pick up some gifts for her. We picked out a baby bath tub that was adorable as it came with a froggy slip-resistant bottom, a couple of bath toys, and a cup-thing for pouring water. Stu insisted that because our gift was for the baby's parents, the baby deserved a gift as well. He picked out a Kaden-approved favorite from his early baby days (a box with shapes cut in the lid and the baby finds the right hole for each shape... in reality they are just really great teethers).

I headed off for an afternoon with the gals. It was wonderful and I finally got to see Miss Eva again (!!!). I hadn't seen her since she left for Pakistan several months ago and it was so wonderful to see her and catch up and of course to see the other ladies as well. Kundi so graciously offered up her house for the festivities and she and Lindsay worked the whole morning getting things ready for the day. Kundi baked cookies and Lindsay decorated them and a cake that said "Welcome Baby Choy". So cute! We had a great time chatting and waiting for the lady of the hour.

After the food and gifts were done, we headed into the kitchen to dye some yarn! I had never seen this done before and was eager to see the process. Lindsay was awesome and gave me two skeins of naked yarn to dye! (And yesterday we hit the store so I could pick out some circular needles to put that yarn to good use with a pattern I picked out! :))

It was fun to do, especially when you pull it out and it slightly varied throughout. I think it looks beautiful and I can't wait to see how it turns out when it's all worked up!

We ended the night with pizza and poker at our house, which has become the weekly thing (although it was inside this time because the A/C broke upstairs, which meant no smoke and cool air). We had a really good time. Lots of laughs and stories. Stu ended up winning (I came in third), so it ended the night on a pretty good note! :)

On to the rumors: After much deliberation, we've decided that Kaden and I will leave here in the next month or two, to go back to Boise and get the process started on purchasing a home (and two cars, furniture, appliances, get enrolled in school, Kaden in daycare, on and on and on...). It's a huge bummer to even THINK about being apart for several months after we've gotten so used to spending so much time together, but this is basically the only way it is all going to work out and us not have to miss a semester of school getting everything ready once we get back. So Stu will be staying here until we'd originally planned and Kaden and I will be leaving in a few weeks to a month or so.

I keep getting almost nauseous feeling about the whole thing. It feels so fast after having only ever just talked about it up until this piont. It's never felt very real and suddenly it's not only real, but happening a few months earlier than I'd anticipated, and (probably my worst fear) I have to once again travel across the planet with my two-year-old all by myself. Ugh. BUT, I made a condition that I not have to connect in the freaking European Union ever again, so I am flying from Abu Dhabi straight into Chicago (!!!) with only one more connection to Boise! Hooray for Etihad! Granted, it's still 27 hours of entertaining a crabby monkey all by my lonesome, and a 5-hour layover once I make it to Chicago (which conveniently be at OUR 4 AM), but it's in America! Yay for America!

We're trying to make the most of it and remind ourselves that this is really the only way for things to go as we want them to go, but it still does just suck. We'll miss Thanksgiving, Christmas (!) and New Years with Daddy. :( We will probably wait to celebrate "our" Christmas until Stu is back, but it makes me sad to think he'll be here all alone for Christmas (his idea, btw, not mine. :))

Here are the pics from the baby shower:

Assembling party favors.

Waiting around for the guest of honor.

The gift table.

The adorable cookies Kundi and Lindsay made!

The shoes... can anyone guess which ones are mine??? (Yep, the boring black flip flops. Hehe)

More waiting and chatting.

"Surprise!"

Look at that bump! :)

Quite a spread, huh? It was sooo good.

Assembled to watch the gift opening.

These gals sure can knit. There were so many creative gifts!

(This would take me ten years to knit.)

Hehe. A Kangaroo... for the Australian Mom-to-be. I thought that was a great idea!

Myself and my Eva! Finally!

The baby bath tub we got them.

Lindsay showing us her fabulous cake creation!

Rama sporting a make-shift apron for the yarn dyeing.

Bedtime Harmonica: Daddy and Kaden

2009-09-08T13:40:00.002+04:00

My little musician in training performing a duet with his Daddy. :)

Kaden Learns to Catch!

2009-09-08T10:57:00.001+04:00

Weekend Poker.

2009-09-06T12:43:00.003+04:00

We did poker again this Friday after a several-week hiatus because of our vacay and then a crabby baby last week. It was... uh, interesting? The good parts were that we had a pretty good time. It's always nice to see friends and we had plenty of laughs, also, I got second place to Mike so we at least got our money back (which is also nice!) but, we had some awkward moments too.

After the psycho-bitch turmoil with some of the (now gone... and both divorced) wives over my blog post over a year ago about the "Little Boys' Club", I'm not going to go into too many details (unless fam and friends really wanna know and then I'll email you the juicy deets, hehe). Suffice it to say, some personalities don't always work in a group setting. Poor Stu was having a hard time keeping his thoughts to himself, lol.

But Kaden enjoyed finally getting his "peeeeesa" (translation: Pizza) he'd been asking for all week. Here are some pics from the weekend and then some pics of my poor sick baby yesterday. I am unfortunately sick today (complete with several occasions of reverse eating, ugh) again. Here's hoping tomorrow is a better day! :)

Kaden really thought he was talking to his "Mom-Mimi" (Momma E).

My sweet boys cuddling and watching a show.

My poor sick baby. This is where he stayed all morning.

High Stepping

2009-09-06T12:13:00.002+04:00

Because summer is so hot here, we've had to get creative with our "exercise" time with Kaden. Here is one of the many fun times. Here, Daddy and Kaden are playing follow the leader. First they are supposed to be going "fast fast" (but he kind of lost interest when I broke out the video camera) and then they are high stepping, which is adorable to me. :)

Waiting At The Raleigh Airport.

2009-09-06T10:57:00.002+04:00

We were bored. This one is kind of lame, but is also the last video we took before we left to come back to Abu Dhabi.

Momma E and Kaden in the Canal!

2009-09-06T10:25:00.003+04:00

So, as you can tell, Kaden was not as big a fan of the canal as he was of the ocean (which he is still asking for daily), but here he is trying to brave the big, scary canal with his Momma E! :)

Kaden Getting A Ride From Hayden.

2009-09-06T09:59:00.003+04:00

Hayden found a creative way to entertain Kaden for a bit:

Vacation Weather

2009-09-06T09:29:00.004+04:00

So, I finally figured out how to compress the videos from our vacation (thanks infinity, Sarah!) and I figured I'd post a few of them for your viewing pleasure. :) Enjoy!

Here we are, hanging out downstairs in the screened in room, while enjoying the awesome display of weather we were treated to!

Pantalones No Mas.

2009-09-01T14:07:00.002+04:00

I have been a serious slacker when it comes to keep Kaden’s scrapbook updated, so he and I got to working on it again today. I finished up his baby shower pages (and they’re adorable, btw) and then was pulling out the keepsake stuff from his birth and we found his foot prints! Here he is showing off his foot prints (which he thought were AWESOME! Which you can clearly see by the glee on his face, haha) and his big boy feet. :)

Then, our latest development is that Kaden has decided to stop wearing pants. He wakes up sans pants and as soon as I dress him he is pulling them off. Here he is this morning right after breakfast, getting rid of those terrible things. Lol.

Apparently socks had to go too.

Since We've Been Back.

2009-08-31T11:23:00.004+04:00

Because it took me a week to catch up on blogging from our vacation, I haven’t mentioned anything much about being back here.

So, here’s a photo-blog about being back! :) Specifically for the grandparents. Hehe

Stu's playdough snowman! :)

My boys lounging around.

Capitalism at its best.

Kaden discovered a new way to view the world.

Here he is fresh from nap time!

And here's an update on the countdown chain! :) The one below was the original chain. Making slow, but steady progress.

The Gulf: The NEW "Dead" Sea?

2009-08-31T08:15:00.002+04:00

I've been preaching for months to anyone who will listen about how sick the Gulf is becoming and this article illustrates exactly what I've been saying: the Gulf is sick and dying, it is polluted, and it is now, according to the article, threatening to become too salty to use for desalinization and therefore, drinking water for the UAE. Nice.

I don't eat seafood from here because the fishing industry here is practically criminal (and literally would be if held to global standards). "Sustainable fishing" is a nearly unheard of term and you have to acknowledge that it effects the product of that fishing. The available seafood is the sickly, leftovers of the populations, not healthy, strong species. Add to that the issues with red tide we had here for about 7 months, which killed even more marine life, and you can see the serious problems the Gulf is facing. I wonder what it will take for any real change to happen?

Our Address.

2009-08-30T12:23:00.003+04:00

I think I have mentioned on here before how there are no street addresses in this city. None. No numbers on buildings, and no numbered blocks on street signs.

So, it is Ramadan and I don't like to cook EVERY day. The only other option during this month is to order in because none of the restaurants are open until after sunset (and we eat WAY earlier than that with our 9:00 bed time). So, as most AD residents are aware, to get your food delivered, you must help the driver to find your building through a series of landmarks and they must do the same for you to find them.

I don't REALLY want to put directions to my house on here for obvious reasons, lol. But I will share a similar story about trying to find a place to develop our film last week.

We headed down to where I swore I remembered seeing a sign for "Kodak" about a year ago. Sure enough, the sign was there, but it was a printing and laminating shop. No film developing. So we asked an Emerati man in his Land Rover where we could get 35 mm film developed in town and he sent us to Carrefour. When we got there we learned that you could BUY 35 mm film there, but not develop it. So we asked the guys in electronics where to find a place to develop it.

"Oh yes, very simple. Go down, away, take first roundabout and go right. At past second light, go right, it is beside the fruit stand. Very simple."

So Stu set off going "away"... but the wrong "away" and we ended up on the outer rim road (which, those who haven't gotten lost down there lately, it's finally open and will actually take you back to Abu Dhabi now!). We made our way back to about where the shop should be, but by very different directions, and we found a different one after scanning the store shop names of about 3 blocks worth of stores. The fun part ended up being trying to remember we'd left our film when it was time to pick it up.

I hope in the near future they figure out a good way to address (pun intended) the address system here. So I never have to say another time, "You know Al Wahda Mall?" ("Yes.") "You know Abu Dhabi bus station?" etc. when I just want a pizza or Chinese.

Sarah's Vacay Videos

2009-08-28T23:57:00.001+04:00

So, for some reason, the videos Sarah took on her camera and shared with us to take back home won't upload on here. She found a way to make them a smaller size so they upload, but until I figure out what to do about my uploading issues, I can't get them on here. So, in the meantime, check out Sarah's brand new blog for some videos of Kaden and Co. while on vacation! They are adorable!

August 19th: The Final Day

2009-08-25T15:08:00.002+04:00

After we got up, Mom made pancakes, eggs and toast for breakfast before we finished packing up and said our goodbyes. I hate that part and especially this time after as much fun as we’d had.

The drive between the beach and Raleigh. I will definitely miss all that green!

The drive to Raleigh was smooth except it ended up being an hour shorter than Google maps told me it was. After we got back home I Googled the route again and it was right, so I have no idea why our route said an hour longer. Anyway, no harm done. It just meant we were super early to turn in the car.

Kaden, a half hour after we left the house.

These are some convicts cleaning up the freeway. I love community-minded projects like these. :)

The whole process of turning in the car, riding the bus to the airport, checking in, and going through security all took less than a half hour (since we’re superstars at security checkpoints these days, hehe) so we got to the waiting area about 3 ½ hours before our flight boarded. Stu and I took turns going on walks with Kaden to give the other a break. Kaden was full of energy (always a great thing when he must then sit for the next whole day…) and was pretty whiny, but ok considering what we could have been up against. We took advantage of being in Raleigh and the last opportunity to have NC BBQ, and we had barbeque sandwiches and coleslaw for dinner at the airport.

The flight to London was pretty easy. Stu and I didn’t get any sleep, which is really never good, but Kaden slept quite a bit and skipped both provided meals. I got to watch a movie (17 Again is just as good the second time around) from start-to-finish, which must be some sort of record with the Monk.

We landed in London and went through security where they “confiscated” our 118 ml bottles of children’s Tylenol and Benadryl. Now, I have been through the London airport two other times before this (and countless other airports), carrying the SAME exact bottles in Kaden’s diaper bag, however this is the first time I pulled them out while I was pulling out his sippy cups (which they just made me pretend to sip and then let pass no problem). They made a huge deal out of it saying we could only carry 100 ml bottles through security (though the actual liquid in them was far less than 100 ml total). So stupid. So we went to a little store and paid more (it turned out) for empty plastic bottles than for a new, full bottle of Benadryl. Nice. We made it back to the bitch at security and poured the scant contents of the bottles into new bottles and were on our way. The moral of the story? Keep your contraband in a pocket in your bag and they probably won't find it anyway. Ugh!

Due to our longer-than-planned stay at security, Kaden’s too-full diaper had leaked through his diaper and through his clothes (and through his stroller, if we’re being quite honest) so we had an emergency rendezvous with the changing room.

We tried to catch an earlier flight to Abu Dhabi, but due to our frugality when purchasing the tickets, they were unchangeable and would require us to go out to the front of the airport to the kiosk, re-buy tickets, and get back through security and boarded all within the half-hour remaining before the flight left. Lame. So we settled in for an 8-hour layover.

Having been through Heathrow a couple times now, we know right where everything is located, so we headed back to the uncrowded bathrooms and then to wait in the special assistance room (which also happens to be the only place in the whole airport that is properly air conditioned) to wait out our time. They have little cot-like seating here that you can stretch out on, so Stu and I again took turns walking Kaden around in his stroller and then we ate breakfast at TGIFriday’s, which has become something of a tradition for us. Lol.

After another hour or so of fussy Monkey, he finally fell asleep in his stroller on my walking shift and then I took him back to where Stu was laying down. I hooked my foot through his stroller and rested it on his lap and we all got a little snooze for about an hour or so, which turned out to be amazingly important after so many hours of no sleep. Kaden woke up just in time for our gate to be assigned and we headed down to wait to board the plane.

Stu and I briefly discussed the pros and cons of giving Kaden more Benadryl, but agreed that because it says it can be given every 4-6 hours (it had been about 12 hours), if he got upset again, we’d just do it and deal with future sleeping issues when we got home. Sure enough, he began to lose his mind about two hours into the flight (after watching the same episode of Barney 4 times in a row on the TV[ thank you, thank you, wonderful Etihad for being so passenger-friendly]). He got his sleep and Mom and Dad watched more TV and ate more food in peace.

I would like to take the opportunity here to say how seriously wonderful Etihad is. There are plenty of things about this country that irk me, but when it comes to airlines, they are at the head of the pack. Our flight attendants, once again, were amazingly helpful and courteous (ours was an obviously gay slight black man who asked me if I was Canadian and was bummed when he found out that I was not, too, of America's Hat). It's impossible to be uncomfortable or bored on Etihad and I'm telling you, if you ever get the chance, fly with them. I feel so strongly about it that I have become willing to pay nearly double for our last flight home in a few months just so we can avoid European airports (just shoot me, please) and American carriers. Etihad flies direct to New York and Chicago and I'm determined to get on one of those flights.

We got to Abu Dhabi around 2:30 AM and sluggishly made our way through immigration and got to the baggage claim to find no baggage. After an hour of back-and-forth with the lost baggage lady, when I had already decided that we would file a claim and worry about it later, (I needed sleep BAD) they figured out that they put about 4 families’ baggage on the wrong carrousel. So we headed down to “4” which is in a different area of the airport and finally got all of our bags.

We took the bus to the rental car place and got our car easily and were on the road home. After such a long day of travel, it felt comforting to see the endless sand and familiar roads and trees and landmarks. Stu already started feeling down about being back, but I was curiously lifted by the fact that this place had become our home, for now, and that being back, though it definitely has its downfalls, was oddly comforting to me.

We got to our building, which Kaden calls “the place” (not sure where or why he picked that up, lol) and he sleepily announced, “Ooohh, the place!” He totally recognized his home and sounded relieved to be back. We went in and aside from a suspicious 2-foot pile of about 200 dead gnats and a broken air conditioner, it was just as we’d left it.

After much-needed showers for everyone, I vacuumed the gnats (at 3 AM) and stripped to the bare essentials and we all went to bed. Our nasty, uncomfortable bed has never felt so comfy or been so large! We’d been sleeping in a double sized bed for a week and it felt nice not to HAVE to touch! Haha. (And with having an air conditioner broken, it was also a necessity.)

Of course, upon our return, the house and country problems all started again with a vengeance, but I am pleased to say that after a week, our A/C was fixed and they also made good on the promise of a “new” washer for our apartment! It works (today at least...) and I hope other than doing bed sheets, I’ll never have to use the ones upstairs again (though I’m probably not that lucky).

The day after we got back, Ramadan officially started, marking the beginning of the end of the misery for me here. I have associated the “end” with Ramadan both because of the restrictions on eating and drinking, etc, and because of the heat of the summer. After Ramadan is over, it will again be cool enough to go outside and play, we can picnic again, and Kaden can play at the parks. It also means we’re one month closer to going home. So here’s to surviving the holy month without much more added damage! We’re one week down, three to go! Ramadan Kareem!

August 18th: Day Fourteen

2009-08-25T14:18:00.006+04:00

After breakfast, Stu and I headed to Food Lion to pick up a disposable camera for the deep sea fishing trip. I didn’t want our camera to go in case it got dropped in (that boat goes incredibly fast and you HAVE to hold on). So we settled for a disposable.

The boys got the boat ready and everyone except Mom, Kaden and I went (the sleepy head and the two motion-sickers. Stupid). I decided it would be unwise to get back on a plane already motion sick, so I opted out of the trip. After they left, Kaden thrilled himself with spraying Momma E with the water hose and then soaking himself. I cleaned up the house and did the dishes and then joined them out under the gazebo where Kaden took his lunch (ah, the life).

Getting ready to head out!

Bye bye!

These next 6 Stu took with the disposable while they were out there (talk about a quality difference, sheesh):

Granddad driving the boat.

The open sea.

This is an Army Corps of Engineers boat for dredging the bottom of the waterway so it stays deep enough for the boats to go through.

She's the Queen of the world!

Stu said they did a lot of this because the fish weren't biting. :)

I finally got a chance to drive all by my lonesome and went to the Crab Pot to pick up some SheCrab soup for my Mom and me for lunch. Kaden had gone down for nap by the time I made it back with the soup and the two of us enjoyed an eerily quiet lunch while we got to catch up on our respective books in peace with no one else around. Mom laid down on the couch to rest and I knocked out half my book before also turning in for a wonderful afternoon nap in the sunshine coming in our room.

After nap we headed to pick up some fudge to send home for Grandma Jan (Mike’s wife, who’s Dad is dying so she couldn’t come down to the beach). Then we went to the store to get some snacks for our return journeys back home (which we realized was about the same number of hours… us on a plane and layovers, them driving straight through. 32 hours. I can’t imagine that one!). We got back to the house right after the boat made it back home (unfortunately they didn’t catch anything).

Here they are coming back in.

While Stu started the coals, Mom and I went to work on dinner which consisted of clam chowder, fried flounder, apples and onions, broccoli, baked potatoes, and salad to accompany our (Stu) grilled steaks (it was our last night and the food all needed to be eaten). After dinner, Granddad, Stu and I took Kaden out to the dock to feed the fishies the dinner leftovers. Then we gathered up all of our stuff and got pretty well packed and ready to go.

Cooking fools. :)

The living room at the beach house.

Kaden walking with Great Granddad out to feed the fishies the leftovers from dinner.

Tossing in an orange slice!

Fishies love oranges, who knew?

August 17th: Day Thirteen

2009-08-25T14:04:00.001+04:00

No one got enough sleep but Mom made biscuits and gravy for breakfast and then mercifully took a teething and crabby Kaden (and Alli) to the beach so the rest of us could eat in peace. When they got back, Stu, Hayden, Granddad and I went out on the boat so the boys could go tubing. It was fun watching them and other than ending up sore, they had a great time. We came back and Stu, Hayden and I went souvenir hunting. Stu and I found a magnet (we collect them from the places we’ve been) and Stu got another sleeveless t-shirt because he’s wanted a few more.

Getting ready to leave to go tubing.

Kaden having the best time spraying Momma E with the hose. Look at the joy on his face! lol

We stopped for lunch at a little local diner called Mollie’s and then headed back. We all loaded up on the boat this time and rode out to a deserted island where the waterway touches the open ocean and hung out and hunted for seashells (they’re bigger and less broken there because it’s their first stop). We got to see a sting ray in the water and of course, I got seasick on the way back to the house. (Trolling along for over ten minutes just doesn’t work for me… and we trolled for about a half hour, ugh) I felt like crap through dinner which sucked because we had barbeque, chicken, and fixin’s for dinner. They boys were all tired from the day so we decided to forego flounder gigging that night. Hayd and I shared some pizza rolls before bed and then we all called it a day.

August 16th: Day Twelve

2009-08-25T12:20:00.004+04:00

Kaden was up at 6, which meant and early rise for most everyone else too. Momma E and Kaden fed the birds in the morning and then Mom made bacon, eggs, grits, and toast for breakfast. Then we headed to the beach. The waves were so awesome this day. Probably ten or so feet high with a killer undertow. We all had a hard time swimming back once we were tired and had to stick together for that reason. My siblings, as with the whole trip, were so much fun and so funny. We had such a great time and generated so many inside jokes (i.e. “Activity Request”). It was great. We saw a couple of dolphins playing in the waves near us (like ten yards away at one point). When I first saw them I was kind of freaked out and Stu called me a chicken. Then when they got so close he said, “Maybe we should get out.” Lol! Who’s the chicken now? :)

Kaden and Momma E feeding the seagulls.

We went back home for lunch and to let Kaden nap and then relaxed for a bit in the afternoon. Kaden got brave enough to get in the boat with his grandparents and he had a great time driving the boat.

A view of the canal from the dock at the beach house.

Stu and I "napping" (goofing off with the camera instead).

Coming back in from crusing around the waterway.

Captain Kaden.

Steve and Dad.

While they were out cruising around, Steven, Brook and Alli arrived and we headed back to the beach where the waves were HUGE. We saw a small sand shark (about 3 feet long) and fought 10+ foot waves. I taught Brook how to dive into them when they are too high and she was brave and ventured out into the deeper water with us big kids.

Then we came back and had hotdogs and hamburgers for dinner (Stu was the grill master of course). Then Stu, me, Steve, Dad, Maddy, Hayd, Brook and Alli headed out to go flounder gigging. Stu and Hayden each caught one, but then after about an hour and a half, I of course had to get seasick. They were wonderful enough to drop me back at the house (stupid body) around 12:30 AM. They made it back (with two additional fish) around 2 AM. Apparently my hair had been hanging on to the sand from the waves, in spite of like 5 showers a day, because, that night when it finally dried, it released it all into the bed (and I’m talking a SHIT TON of sand). I slept terribly between brushing the sand out every hour or so and bizarre dreams all night long.

Stu with his big flounder.

The stab marks!