Sunday, March 22, 2009

Dear Anonymous:

I recieved this comment as a response to my prior "Shower" blog. It's frustrating to me when I get nasty comments because, number 1, I don't get paid to blog, I do so as a hobby and as a way for my friends and family to feel closer to us while we are too far away to see them and as such I should have every right to blog about whatever the Hell pops into my head without some "secret" person who has nothing better to do policing my site.

And number 2, because while it may drag me down a bit on an otherwise tolerable day, it is obvious that the only people who write things like this do so because they are personally offended by something I'm doing that they cannot... in this case, having a relatively happy life in spite of living in my own version of Hell. It's not up to be to make anyone else feel better, and it's also not my job to feel perfectly happy in an oppressive, second world country, just because other people are too egotistical and fake to say anything truthful. I think my honesty, while I'm certain to offend some, is one of my best qualities, and is either way, one of the first things that readers of my blog thank me for.

Here is the comment: (you can also find it in the comments section below this blog.)

"You are so miserable here. Why do you stay? Just leave, go back to your wonderful country since it has so much more to offer you. You act as though you are kept here against your will. If that is the case call the police.

For someone so miserable all the time, constantly complaining about everything, you'd think you would be smart enough to just go home. Oh wait, your country is in a bit of shambles and oh your husband may cheat on you whilst your gone. I see, you are here for the money and to keep an ever constant controlling eye on your spouse. You are a trader to your country and a hyprocrite, a person who pretends to have virtues, moral or religious beliefs, principles, etc., that he or she does not actually possess, esp. a person whose actions belie stated beliefs. Take your country talking, thinking, verbal diarhea back to your own country. How does your husband stay married to you?"

Ok, my turn:

Of course I am miserable here. Anyone would be, and most of the Americans I know who live here are miserable.

But we can't go home yet. We ARE here for the money. That's the only reason we came and it's the only reason we're still here. And we're saving a shit ton of it. My country does have a lot more to offer me, when it is in decent economic times. We're not going to go home when we have a high-paying job here just to waste our savings not being able to find employment like the rest of America is doing.

I don't only complain. I report. This particular blog talked only about what we did this weekend (again, as I've said too many times, this blog is for my friends and family back home. I don't give a shit how anyone else takes how I write about our experiences, and anyone who actually knows us well enough to care to read this would have the balls to sign their name to what they write). Of course I'm complaining about our shower head exploding and not being able to correctly wash as a result of a lazy society and irresponsible building maintenance.

My husband, son, and I are a family. We came here together to make a better future for ourselves while we had a chance to do it (this job). I'm not going to go back to the States without him and have him make all the money and us be apart. It's not about cheating, it's about our relationship and OUR life. It is one... he could never go days or weeks or months without seeing Kaden or me. And that's not something for me to apologize for. We are a happy, strong family unit and he is even more miserable here, away from our families, than I am. But we're in this together. For better or worse. I'm sorry that you don't have the same privilege with your own cheating husband when you go home on vacation without him. But again, it's not my problem.

From the beginning I have written from my heart about being here. It's been so hard a lot of the time, but at least I am honest with myself and the world. As a result, it means that I am very vulnerable. Someone having a hard time with life does not need to try to bring me down and hurt me just because they can't live up to the virtues and morals that I have.

I'd imagine my husband stays married to me because I am a good wife, a good mother, and I have helped him become a better person by having me in his life, or so he'd told me. But I suppose you'd have to ask him.

It’s comments like these that make me grateful for the genuine, good people I've been lucky enough to meet here, like Lulu and Lindsay, Eva and Kundi, Hala and Rama. And not for the people who have turned out to be backstabbing, malicious, unhappy, immoral people like Sam and Rainy. The only type of people who would have any reason to hold other, happier people responsible for their misery. (Especially watching someone who is half their age do it better.)

I take no responsibility for anything except for what I actually do. I've done my best for my family and real friends to live the best that I can, and given the circumstances, I think I've done a pretty good job.

(Side Note: It should probably be noted that you shouldn't call someone out on their "verbal diarrhea” when you’re spouting your own. Invest in spell check:

It’s “hypocrite”, you think I’m a “traitor”, not a “trader” (unless you really think I’m importing and exporting goods), and try “diarrhea” next time.)


  1. ((((((virtual hugs))))))

    It really sucks that someone is such a loser that they virtually stalk you and post this kind of crap on your blog.

  2. By explaining yourself to these assclowns that leave nasty comments on your blog, you only give them more power. Don't explain yourself to them. You don't have to. They say if you don't like their country, you can leave. Well, if they don't like your blog, they can opt to not read it. As simple as that. On the other hand, by explaining yourself to them, and showing them attention (even if is negative attention), you give these people power over you. They wanted to upset you, and they did it. That is what they wanted. To provoke you. I've had this many many times in my blog. My advice is to just delete the comment and go on with your business. I assure you at some point they will stop. Attention is attention, doesn't matter if is positive or negative!

    BTW, I'm just posting as anonymous because I am not registered in Blogger...

  3. Aw Sweetie, don't let some idiot who has nothing better to do than say nasty things about someone's blog get to you. I agree with the "nice" anonymous who says it just gives the "nasty" one attention. Those of us who know you know how sweet and non-judgemental you are. And those of us who are expats in this not-so-fantastic country know exactly how you feel!! lotsa love, lulu

  4. Dear Anonymous,

    I found your ignorant rant to be almost comical. What’s frustrating to me is that you feel safe behind your computer, hunched over, drool running from the corner of your mouth, pecking away at the keyboard, throwing out ridicules and misspelled insults in an ill-fated attempt to hurt my wonderful wife’s feelings. When in all actuality it is your life that’s lackluster and falling apart all around you. I love my wife more than I’m sure you could ever comprehend.

    All I can advise is for you it to crawl back into the dark damp cave you managed to somehow make your way out of and continue to rot.


    Stuart, Sydney’s adoring husband!

  5. I learned a long time ago you can't change the way some one feel's about you, so don't bother! Your anonymous reader has to have someone to vent on to make their self feel better by running you down. Their problem is not your's, don't give them fuel by replying to their comment's, it only serve's to know they are getting under your skin.
    You are not going to win, so don't fight a battle of wit's with a unarmed witless person. You are doing just fine and we are behind you.
    Hate filled people are everywhere, but you guy's are above them!

    Love Tom and Patty

  6. A better daughter/mother/sister/WIFE
    has never existed!

    I Love You Millions!!! You are the sunshine of my life!


  7. Oh hunny, you know that everyone who tuely knows you loves you for your honesty and bluntness!! You are one of the most amazing people I have ever met. I am truely blessed to call you my friend!! You should really find it flattering that an ignorant asshole took so much time out of their day to think about you and what iggnorant comment they were going to leave on your blog.

    You are doing something most American women including myself wouldnt have the courage to do. You and Stu made a choice to sacrifice time in your lives to make a better life for your son!! Screw the idiots who can't understand that. You have the right to say whatever you want, and please continue to do so. I know that when I get to work on Wednesday mornings the first thing I do is go read your blog so I can get caught up on the happinings in Sydney land!! So please don't let the negative comments bring you down.

    You truely are and amazing woman and Stu is very lucky to have you as a wife!! Kaden #2 and I love you guys very much!!

    Kristin and Kaden #2

  8. You know I love you!

  9. I agree with the first "anonymous". Delete and ignore. I got a weird comment on my blog once, and then set it so I can approve all comments. If I don't like the comment (even if it's made by my own family!) I don't post it. No need to feed the hate!

  10. I think some people have to make others feel small to make themselves feel better. Feel sorry for your mystery blogger, Syd. I sure do! To think they would pick on a woman first of all is just wrong and then for them to cut you down must mean that they have a small, lonely life. See, SAD! What a LOSER! LOVE YOU! Jess :)

  11. You are an amazing person, mother, wife and granddaughter! We think of you and Stu and Kaden everyday. To think that there are horrible people out there trying to attack you in verbage is, actually, FUNNY! I laughed at some of those comments being made by the coward who has no balls to sign their name. I can't believe anyone would comment so harshly on someone they don't even know. Of course, this person could be someone you know and they are trying "to get even" for whatever reasons. If that's the cause, then they are jackasses to the core. All your family and all your friends (with whom you have hundreds) know you to be truthful, honest and wise. You are wise beyond your years. You are creative and loving and it shows when you are with you, Stu and Kaden. If this lost soul, wayward person or just plain mean one knew you for your inner core, then they'd be writing to apologize to you and ask forgiveness. I say, forget them and go on with life. Anyway, what is that person..?? ONE of billions on earth, so screw them! They are idiots in the truest form! Their judgement will come one day and they will be reminded of the nastiness of their living. All of us here in our great country loves you beyond measure and don't pay any attention to the faggots of the world who only gets their rocks off by downing someone who is truly good. You are wayyy better than anyone like this piece of crap! Keep your beautiful head up and take care of your great family and piss on the ones who can't take it that someone in this world has gumption enough to move to a foreign country and make money to return to the homeland and live out their lives in freedom. Not everyone living abroad is the type who cheat and lie (as is obviously happening to this personn) so they must be wallowing in pity, self-pity, and have to lash out at someone else to make their living hell seem better! Poor, poor, anonymous...I agree with Stu, go back to your hole and rot into the earth!

  12. The best thing about your blog, other than it giving your loved ones an easy way to keep up, is that you write in a very sophisticated and educated manner. Sure, there has to have been plenty of times when you've just wanted to sit down and say "everything about this country is terrible, I want to go home where everything is perfect and I'm safe and know everyone loves me." But you're realistic. You guys are doing what's best, and I'm awfully proud of you for being honest about it.
    Your blog is wonderful- the highlight of many of my days! Don't be discouraged by the lesser beings out there who can't accept reality. Love you very much. (and Stu! What gumption!!)

  13. I agree with most of the comments. I learned a long time ago that there will always be ignorant people in the world and there is nothing we can do about it. Someone told me a while back that what others think about you is none of your business. You are the greatest thing to happen to me in my life. You keep being Sydney and that is good enough for me. I love you so much. The haters can go to hell.

  14. It never fails to astound me just how petty people can be. You are entitled to your opinions. Forget 'em, Syd.

  15. I love your blog and your (sometimes brutal) honesty :) Don't ever censor yourself or your feelings. Stay strong girl!

  16. Seems like a long list of people who love and support you guys. Add me to them. The two of you are wonderful people, wonderful parents and the three of you make a beautiful family. Don't let the ramblings of some mouth breathing troglodyte ruin your day or impress upon you how those of us that know you may feel about you. None of us feel that way about you. As for deleting their posts? I don't know if I'd do that or not. Maybe it's better post them and not respond to them and allow those of us who know and love you defend you. That's what friends do.

  17. Don't feed the trolls, Sydney! They want to get attention... leave them alone and they'll go away