There is some more information coming out about the Newtown,
Connecticut shooting. Apparently the shooter (wrong identified as his older
brother in early broadcasts) was a 20-year-old with Asperger’s Syndrome. (I am
not going to glorify his behavior with perpetuating the “fame” he’s been allowed
by the media with the plastering of his photo and name all over the place.)
While his mental diagnosis is not hugely important, it could
be very relevant in explaining the lack of empathy that had to have been involved
in taking the lives of 20 first graders and seven adults. Asperger’s is marked
by high intellect and low empathy and typically low socialization. In a period
where people are searching for answers that will undoubtedly never be fully
answered, and even if they are, not satisfactorily answered, having SOME
understanding is better than nothing.
As a parent of a 5-year-old, I am struggling with how to
handle talking about it. I’ve read conflicting suggestions by psychologists
about whether or not to even mention it to a child so young. One piece of
advice was to not talk about it and to keep them sheltered from the media
coverage. Another said to bring it up because they will inevitably hear about
it from their peers and they should have knowledge of it from a parent they
trust before they can hear scary stories from other kids and worry about it.
In the end I chose to not say anything about it. I figured
if no one else at school does say anything about it, it’s better for him to be
sheltered from fear than to face any traumatizing effects. Still, as with so
many aspects of being a parent, I am unsure what the “right” thing to do really
was.
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